Monday, April 30, 2007

when i heard the news today, i felt the sudden change.
it seemed like nothing's gonna be the same no more.
as i closed my eyes, tears of hurt and pain began to flow.
i wanted you to understand, yet it was a misunderstanding at the end.

with my arms wide open,
they're for you to lean on when you feel like it.
it takes courage and trust to open up but not fear.
-you know who you are.

i guess it did hurt to be the last one to find out but the words you said were like a knife stabbing right into my heart, to be misunderstood of being selfish...
since it's all good now, i hope you'll ponder bout what i msged you.
i'm always here, open up when you're ready...

mySWEETaddiction <3
6:00 PM.

Sunday, April 29, 2007

friends
i'm feeling very SHITTY right now.
so much for all the times i've been asking,
it seems to me like they're just excuses you're providing.

i guess maybe it's just that i'm not good enough,
maybe it's just that i'm not smart enough.
maybe...

sometimes, it just makes me wanna cry.
do you hear me crying?

mySWEETaddiction <3
4:15 PM.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

today was exceptionally tiring since i had insufficient slp.
was running to the loo the whole night,
i guess i probably had something bad unknowingly.

SDSP today was quite fun, had a switched of lesson after maths.
skipped poa unintentionally though, Theon called and met me outside the library and afterwhich, he refused to let me head back.
so we kindah slacked at the D&T's block staircase, till lesson was over.
blah blah blah...

it was a secret that i found out,
something that somehow made my heart skipped a beat.

mySWEETaddiction <3
9:40 PM.

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

why tell me, when you jolly well know, maybe not the nxt time the same thing that's gonna come out of your mouth is gonna be different.

so tell me, what's the point of saying it to me then?

-nothing about my love.

mySWEETaddiction <3
6:55 AM.

Sunday, April 22, 2007

19mths of love.

i'm pretty tired since i got back home from baby's place at only 3 this morning.
waited for the love to get back home before going to bed.

yesterday
it wasnt pretty much a pleasent day since....
shant elaborate but i dont think he shld get blamed for it.
anyway, we spent the day slacking ard at his place since there wasnt anywhere in particular to head to so our celebration was just spending time with each other in his cosy embrace.

today
met up with YingFu, Jeremy and his wife for coffee session.
time flies, Jeremy's son is already a year plus old.
we basically had tea together and accompanied the couple for some grocery shopping.

i cant wait for our nxt meet up.
seeing how fast my godson is growing,
it gets me looking forward to starting a family with him.

mySWEETaddiction <3
7:30 PM.

Thursday, April 19, 2007

leave me alone right now.
this is suchah wrg time.

14weeks and 1day left.

treasure and appreciate.
pls understand how i feel too.

it's not easy for me, i fear.

mySWEETaddiction <3
7:00 PM.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

I TOTALLY SCREWD MY PRELIM'S CHINESE ORAL!
RARR.

dont ask me how i know it,
i just do.

mySWEETaddiction <3
5:20 PM.

i've all along thought that i wasnt bothered much that baby's going NS this year since we've all along only met during the weekends.
so, NS wont be affecting us much either.

Weili has been trying to get me feel the fear of him enlisting to NS soon and stuffs but i've all along laughed it off.
just ytd, when baby told me that his bro has got his enlistment letter,
i felt the sudden fear that things werent gonna be that simple as i thought.
i replied immediately asking what about you?
thk god, his turn hasnt come yet, but i know it's sooner or later.

i fear.

mySWEETaddiction <3
7:00 AM.

Monday, April 16, 2007

friday
FRIDAY THE 13TH.
DEFINITELY BAD LUCK!

though it was kindah sway(bad luck) since it was fri the 13th,
it was definitely fun to have such an excitement once awhile in sch.
considering that we're in the better class,
teachers too expect more from us.

what we did was totally insane!
anyway, the usuals of skipping the queue up part after recess since it was mrJoseph's lesson and we girls were just too lazy to change out of our PE shirts, we headed straight back to class.
somehow, our absence got realised and mrSubash came looking for us,
but we ended up playing hide&seek for awhile.
lucky for us, he only felt disappointed and decided not to give us detention.

waited for baby to come before we baked cupcakes.
i've realised that baking is another thing that can bring us both closer, and it too fills his always hungry stomach.

mySWEETaddiction <3
3:55 PM.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

i totally screwd up both tests today.
the qns that came out for chem were just totally crazy for us,
and we got mrsLim angry with mixed emotions.
she was having mixed emotions when she saw how everyone cracked our heads apart when the qns were quite straight forward, to her that is.

anyway, honey and i met up with Ivan after sch for our late lunch and slacked over at BK since we are finally free for this week.
Wil Wil came over to find me and we made a short trip to Cold Storage before we seperated in pairs.
accompanied Wil Wil for his super zilian time taking neos alone,
and we left soon after since he got to leave early.

great day!

mySWEETaddiction <3
5:53 AM.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

i am a very very good girl today, indeed i am.
first of all, i completed my whole chinese test all by myself without copying honey's when she was sitted just by my side.
then, i even stayed back till 4 to continue doing my physics TYS even though our class peer-tutoring session ended at 2.30.

partly cause i was waiting for Felicia's reply to pass me the goodies she brought back for me from Japan, but we ended up not meeting cause she was stuck at RP till forever.
thks girl. loves!
so honey and i went for an impromptu haircut which we intended to for quite sometime but we were just too busy.
so anyway, we were grumbling about how the rain seemed never ending.
it's great to have suchah cool weather but i dread getting drenched.

alright, chem and geog tests tmr.
@__@

mySWEETaddiction <3
7:25 PM.

Monday, April 09, 2007

first day of the week and already a crazy one for me,
that's not the end of it too...
the whole week is already packed with lots of tests and remedial.
what a day to start my week!

anyway, today seems to be a rather tiring day.
everyone was complaining and heads were almost hitting on the table just when the first period started.

having sufficient slp, not.
today's bag added to my crazy day,
it was so heavy that the joint of my shoulder felt like giving way.
thk god honey was nice enough to cab home with me, as usual.
love you babe, but i love you even more today =)
i'm glad to be home already, the sudden urge of wanting to crash onto my bed even though i dont have the habit of taking afternoon naps.
oh well. i might consider slacking my day away after i'm done with homewk and grp work stuffs.

fyi. i'm totally not bothered by how you behaved, in actual fact,
i cant be bothered by how you behaved at all.
to me, everything you do seems pretty sick at times.
as innocent as you may seem, it isnt always the case.
i would categorise you as scheming instead, or rather,
you fit so much better under that category of ppl.
i really wonder how your future circle would be like...
if you're wondering who i'm refering to, you might not know,
you might just be the one.

mySWEETaddiction <3
3:45 PM.

Sunday, April 08, 2007

who on earth wakes up so early at 7.30 in the morning when there'ss totally no plans for the day?
well, i'm the idiot!
seriously speaking, i'm tired but it was hell when i couldnt get back to slp.
it's bloody 7.30 and i'm already awake.

anyway, the weekend didnt went as well as i thought it would.
shouldnt get on it any further but i did enjoyed though,
just that it wasnt as fun as the previous week.

friday
the love came over in the afternoon and we baked cookies,
it was for his mum's birthday that just passed this week.
we were rotting inside my room for an hour plus after trying to decide where to head to for dinner, so we ended up meeting his parents for dinner over at Beach Rd.
the food was great, but the bill that came after... WOOOOO!
it was expensive but i guess it's quite worth it since the food was really good.

before we got home, we dropped by Bugis to get his sis the adidas watch she wanted for her birthday then and home sweet home it was...

the end of my day was bad, just bad.
i asked a qns hoping for the ans i thought i had expected,
but what i got it was just totally unexpected.
i got pretty upset and disappointed.

cried myself to slp.

saturday
met him at city hall and i was in a very foul mood.
he randomly decided to catch a movie and i agreed reluctantly,
i was in no mood for anything to be precise.
whatever!
so we had some food over at TCC while waiting for the movie to start.
thks to the cesear saland with smoked salmon,
my mood got so much better.

caught the movie, TMNT.
it was alright but there are parts of it when baby and i got pretty lethargic.
we headed straight over to Velocity and Square2,
collected my bag from Velocity's outlet after hesitating at the shop for quite sometime.
thk god i got it in the end after baby gave the go-ahead sign,
i totally love it even more when i got home but i burnt a hole in my pocket.
this calls for me to start saving again, i've stopped for quite sometime and i've been very dependant on my ATM card recently.
dinner-ed at LJS and we headed home, but it wasnt long before his parents came to fetch him back.

today
another stay-home sun since Wil Wil is broke and Zheng Zheng did not reply.
probably they'll be free for our coffee session nxt weekend, i hope.
Zheng Zheng hasnt been meeting up as regularly as Wil Wil and i, that busy ass.

alright, rest time before the nieces and nephew come over.

mySWEETaddiction <3
12:30 PM.

Thursday, April 05, 2007

INFERIOR.
LOW-SELF ESTEEM.
MOTIVATED

an open heart post.
ppl who knows me, find me someone cheerful even though half of my life is filled troubling with matters which dont matter as much i think they are.
it's all facade, it's just a mask i wear to hide my insecurities.

i guess very few friends have probably seen this side of me.
i've nvr exactly opened this side of me to many,
or rather i felt that it's hard for anyone to understand either.
there wasnt a reason to let anyone know at all.

ever since i'm old enough to know what's right and wrg,
i've chose to put this mask on so ppl ard me would be happy.
but in actual fact, there's so much of me that i'm not happy about.
you'll probably start saying,
you shld be contented with what you have, many arent even that fortunate.
i know i'm fortunate but that's not the point.

i've always felt inferior, regardless of who i'm standing beside with but as i grow older year by year, the feeling inside seems to get unbearable.
seeing friends ard dressing up beautifully heading out, looking great regardless of what they wear.
to me, it feels like billions of needles piercing inside.
it's so hard to look good in something, what more get clothes that fits me perfectly, hiding my flaws and show the best of me to everyone.
i dont have a pretty face, a face ppl will look and realise that i lack nothing inside out.
everyone these days are going,
wow, what a gorgeous body, pretty face etc she has...
gone are the days when ppl ard you truly look at what you really are inside, or maybe such days dont even exisit at all.

i was looking out of the window in class the other day, looking across at the sch opposite.
how those innocent the pri sch kids are,
while they just enjoyed engaging in the activities they're in.
i felt the sudden ache inside and i turned to honey and told her,
i miss pri sch days when nothing much actually bothers us at all.
relationship, good-looks, perfect body, pretty face etc...
all these werent even in our minds though we envied models on the coverpage of magazines looking so good, but that wasnt occupying much of our thoughts at all.

looking back at past photos taken, i've changed so much.
even my sis thinks that i've lost that innocence i used to have, just trying to keep up with the peer pressure to look good, dress great and be as slim as i can get...

adapting to our surroundings has it's pros and cons.
many of us, teenagers these days are so engrossed in being slim and looking good that it took controlled of our lifes.
we're losing who we really are bit by bit.

there are times i really wished time would slow down,
so we would not regret decisions made.
that is, if only time would slow down for us to treasure those ard us.

mySWEETaddiction <3
8:10 PM.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

after experiencing one of the worst days ytd,
it got me dreaming about the weirdest thing ever.
it turned into a nightmare, but it was all good and sweet at the end.

the sudden appearence of a certain someone turned everything ard, got me smiling when i got up and the image has been lingering in my mind the whole day.
more like i was dreaming of the impossible, i wouldnt want it to come true either but the dream was just a sweet one to rmb that's all.

last min plan to catch a movie since the bestiie wasnt in the best mood to attend sch, met up at khatib before we randomly decided on Mr Bean's Holiday.
it was super draggy and i wasnt quite interested either, small little parts of it which are quite hilarious but other than that, i didnt felt that the movie was worth watching at all.
yet, looking at how hard she was laughing through the whole movie,
i didnt felt the pinch of spending that 7bucks to accompany her.
it was all worth it.

parted and realised that i've not completed my chem homewk and i'm having i'm-too-lazy-to-study physics test tmr.
oh man. why must the last sch day of this week be suchah turn off.
to make things worst, we've got to stay back for the Adam Khoo's booster session till 5plus.
at least, training is cancelled. thk god!

unlike some selfish ppl, i'm willing to share and try.
it doesnt matter if it isnt the enough, at least it's 100% from me.

alright, i better start on my chem now.
-

i said that i was gonna start on my chem homewk but the thought about the booster session tmr has got me addicted to the song Hero again.
i've been glued infront of the com, repeating the same song for an hour plus and i'm still not sick of it yet...

the sudden inspiration that came.
this is specially dedicated to my honey, the one and only.

mySWEETaddiction <3
7:35 PM.

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

i'm so f***ing pissed off with some immature twenty year old,
that my gastrics are killing me out of nowhere right now.
fyi. it isnt my love i'm referring to.

i totally dont give a damn if that person manages to get a glimpse of this post. listen hard, I DONT BOTHER!
you are and have no right to treat her like this, you are just nobody.

i cant believe it.
i've nvr thought how immature you can be, until today.
i witnessed the impossible of how someone your age could actually handle a relationship prob like this, esp. hurting the girl, her feelings in suchah low down way.

your msges, your shoutings etc...
how isit that you can assume something that had nvr happen,
yet picturing it so beautifully like i'm in a movie catching a woman suducing another.
what kindah trust is this when you totally ignored the explainations given, which are totally nothing but the truth.
like what i said when i called, all i'm doing is to get the darn explaination into the pea brain of yours, you can shout and raise your voice at me for all i care.
my motive is just to get that darn explaination into that pea brain so your immature replys and calls wont hurt the feelings of my friend when all she could do is just cry her heart out knowing that whatever she says is just gonna be a piece of garbage when it reaches that rotten ear of yours which cant seem to listen properly.

what kindah f***ing msg is "you dont call me i dont call you. fair. you dont msg me i dont msg you. fair......"
it sounds so much like a pri sch kid trying to say "you dont friend me, i dont friend you. fair."
come on!
which twenty year old, serving our nation replys like some god damn 3year old kid.

let me make this f***ing clear to you right now.
i know how much effort she has put in to make this relationship a better one.
you on the other hand, is just taking every single thing for granted.
seriously, she deserves better, and not someone so overly-sensitive like you. trust, she has given you. what have you gave her?

you are nothing more than a heartache to her!
-

babe:
whatever that happens, like what i told you just now,
you've got to be mentally, physically and emotionally prepared.
i'm here! always here to listen, to cry or laugh together with you.
seeing you in suchah state right now truely breaks my heart,
i know how much you wanted this to work out.

rmb what i said alright.
when it's time to let go, there's no point hanging on to it when at the end of the day, it's just you that is gonna get hurt.

i love you, i'm sure you know =)

mySWEETaddiction <3
8:20 PM.

Monday, April 02, 2007

bestiie and i happened to have nightmare last night,
hers was obviously weird since it's totally impossible for it to happen.
mine on the other hand wasnt as bad, until some unwanted person appeared and made my dream into a nightmare.

met up with Wil Wil after sch and he come over to my hse,
as promised that i would at least allow him to have a nap.
he ended up having no rest at all,
he was busy attending to my shouts every now&then.

i intended to bake a bag of cookies for the girls but well,
my plan failed due to the oven...
we didnt get the hang of it and every batch came up either too soft or too hard.
luckily a few was presentable enough for the girls, not much though.

i guess the main prob lies with the oven since i didnt have much prob when i was baking over at jo's place.
now i know why baby is always laughing at the cookies his sis bakes,
the prob doesnt lies with her at all, it most prob lies with the oven.
since we both happen to be facing the same prob with the end product.

anyway, Wil Wil and i were totally going crazy.
we were numb and sore after trying every batch of cookies that came out, we even started playing whacking asses like insane kids.

okay, i'm officially going to fall sick soon.
the signs are getting more obvious as days passed.
I LOVE HAVING SORETHROAT.

mySWEETaddiction <3
7:20 PM.

Sunday, April 01, 2007

HAPPY APRIL FOOLS DAY.

yesterday
we made a wasted trip over to Marina Square cause sits left for TMNT was lousy, so we decided that it's wiser that we skipped the movie.

i got frustrated when the top i wanted to get from Topshop ran out of my size and when baby didnt want to get me the small balloon i've been bugging him to get me.
so it was double dose of frustration for me,
i even vented out at him at every single thing he did.

we had our late lunch at Billy Bombers cause he insisted that Jack's Place's serving was pathetic and he wanted BIlly Bombers instead, and it ended up with both of us not being able to finish our food.
for those who've been to Billy Bombers,
i'm sure you know how large their serving are.
anyway, by the time i've finished my creamy mushroom soup and sips of smoothie, my tummy was already hitting the limit.
lucky for me that my steak isnt as huge as baby's burger.

mySWEETaddiction <3
3:50 PM.

`daagurl



+ weilin aka lin-
+ <3 HIM_babyboy
+ sweetSIXteen
+ gemini [220590]


`thetalk




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