<3 Unbreak My Heart

2007-05-28T18:40:00.000-07:00

OFFICIALLY MOVED =)

2007-05-15T15:35:00.000-07:00

my other private space is finally ready after a two day miracle of fiddling ard with it.
so i'm just wondering if i shld move over for good or leave this blog still open?
of course if it's gonna stay open than updates are definitely gonna continue.

any opinions about moving?
not like i've got a truckloads of supporters visiting my blog but close friends do read and stuff...
so... yeap, i do wish to hear your opinions if you do have any.

anyway, a few results are back and boy oh boy.
it's another major disaster!
70% chance of getting grounded for my june holis again.

SUCKS BIG TIME.

2007-05-13T16:25:00.000-07:00

slight catching up with jo just now was great,
even more to come after Os are finally over.

anyway, it's disgusting to find pimples popping on my face just slightly after i've had two chicken wings.
i hate the fact that just because i usually dont consume such oily stuffs daily, i really dont deserve such torment when i'm satisfying my craving once awhile.

hmmmm...
i'm wondering if i shld switch over to using LJ instead but than again, i'll miss using blogspot.
my blogskin is getting BORINGGGGGG.
*sighs

2007-05-12T10:40:00.000-07:00

the exams are finally over and i cant be any happier.

it's just that regretful feeling that i have,
i've not even put in the slightest effort.
i'm quite worried about the results even though it's pretty obvious how everything will turn out.
i'll work hard from now, it's a promised i hope to fufil.

i dont wish to get everyone worried over my attitude towards Os,
even i myself is getting worried at how it'll turn out.

friday
baby came by for awhile before we left home and headed to Thomson to check something out.
though it was considered quite a wasted trip since nothing fancy caught his eye, but i had so much fun walking out of the place with him.
the long stretch road out, the long waited bus and bus ride back...
there was nothing else i would exchanged it for.

today
will be meeting him in the afternoon to check that thing out at turf city.
hope he'll see something he likes rather than another wasted trip.

if we have sufficient time left, it'll be shopping before meeting up with the family for an early Mother's Day dinner over at International Building.

pictures, maybe, maybe not.
i'll upload them up if there is.

2007-05-09T15:00:00.000-07:00

ever experienced the dilemma of wanting to hit the books yet no matter how hard you've tried, the end product shows nothing at all?
and in the end, you'll just choose to give up without even trying...

well, i'm kindah feeling this right now.
but hell no, i've not given my best in mugging the shit out of myself.
i've realised that i'm totally faithless in myself.
when i look at others, they seem to always be that smart,
understanding and absorbing everything in a snap.
on the hand, i take forever to understand just one simple qns.

my heart sank after every paper that i've gone through is over,
no doubt for the papers i've had today.
there's not even one sub that i can ans confidently that it's great.
=(

so anyway, while honey and i were on our way to the mrt station,
it started drizzling and before we could even react,
it rained like cats and dogs and we just simple ran all the way.

for once after so long, it felt so good.
it felt like we were back in the good old days where there werent that much probs in mind, playing ard and having fun in the rain just for the sake of it.
there wasnt a reason, but we didnt felt like a reason was needed at all.
we laughed and ran with our hands interlocked till we reached the mrt station, and right at that very moment, we just looked at each other and continued laughing.

after lunch at northpoint, we settled down for a heart-to-heart talk before we left for home.
a huge stone was lifted when i was talking to her,
but the moment i got home, everything changed.

i was flipping through the notes that are needed for tmr's papers.
i'm very clear that there isnt sufficiant time left for complete thorough revision, but my heart isnt even set on getting down to start at all.
the word fail is very clear in mind, and the results are obvious.

my mind's pretty exhausted.
it feels like i cant hold on to what's installed.

2007-05-08T12:45:00.000-07:00

exam period isnt all so ~~sweet~~ despite having early dismissal.
the past few papers are already bad enough on the report card,
what more when it's not officially over yet.

another few more papers to go before it's mugging for prelim,
preparing for Os than WOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOO it is.

havent been updating since it's either hitting the books or tv-ing for me but life's been suchah sweetpie these days.
the love and i are doing great except for those little bickerings we have,
the bestiie has been trying to get me to concentrate on the books but she seemed to have failed yet again.

so anyway, i cant wait for my birthday to come.
it's coming yet so soon again and i'm looking forward to a great day out with him after sch and time spent with the bestiie.

it's gonna be time to hit the books again.

2007-05-05T15:30:00.000-07:00

i just wanna be overloved
over needed
over wanted
over missed when i'm away
over dreamed of
over cared about
over everything...

kiss me, even though you just did a min ago,
reach your arms out for me to fall on,
share your whole world with me like it's supposed to be,
talk to me with overloaded truckloads of sweet nothings...

it's your love that means everything.

2007-05-03T17:00:00.000-07:00

TIME TO HIT THE BOOKS!

2007-05-02T20:45:00.000-07:00

i was a bad girl today.

dirty little secret.

2007-04-30T18:00:00.000-07:00

when i heard the news today, i felt the sudden change.
it seemed like nothing's gonna be the same no more.
as i closed my eyes, tears of hurt and pain began to flow.
i wanted you to understand, yet it was a misunderstanding at the end.

with my arms wide open,
they're for you to lean on when you feel like it.
it takes courage and trust to open up but not fear.
-you know who you are.

i guess it did hurt to be the last one to find out but the words you said were like a knife stabbing right into my heart, to be misunderstood of being selfish...
since it's all good now, i hope you'll ponder bout what i msged you.
i'm always here, open up when you're ready...

2007-04-29T16:15:00.000-07:00

~~friends~~
i'm feeling very SHITTY right now.
so much for all the times i've been asking,
it seems to me like they're just excuses you're providing.

i guess maybe it's just that i'm not good enough,
maybe it's just that i'm not smart enough.
maybe...

sometimes, it just makes me wanna cry.
do you hear me crying?

2007-04-26T21:40:00.000-07:00

today was exceptionally tiring since i had insufficient slp.
was running to the loo the whole night,
i guess i probably had something bad unknowingly.

SDSP today was quite fun, had a switched of lesson after maths.
skipped poa unintentionally though, Theon called and met me outside the library and afterwhich, he refused to let me head back.
so we kindah slacked at the D&T's block staircase, till lesson was over.
blah blah blah...

it was a secret that i found out,
something that somehow made my heart skipped a beat.

2007-04-25T06:55:00.000-07:00

why tell me, when you jolly well know, maybe not the nxt time the same thing that's gonna come out of your mouth is gonna be different.

so tell me, what's the point of saying it to me then?

-nothing about my love.

2007-04-22T19:30:00.002-07:00

19mths of love.

i'm pretty tired since i got back home from baby's place at only 3 this morning.
waited for the love to get back home before going to bed.

yesterday
it wasnt pretty much a pleasent day since....
shant elaborate but i dont think he shld get blamed for it.
anyway, we spent the day slacking ard at his place since there wasnt anywhere in particular to head to so our celebration was just spending time with each other in his cosy embrace.

today
met up with YingFu, Jeremy and his wife for coffee session.
time flies, Jeremy's son is already a year plus old.
we basically had tea together and accompanied the couple for some grocery shopping.

i cant wait for our nxt meet up.
seeing how fast my godson is growing,
it gets me looking forward to starting a family with him.

2007-04-19T19:00:00.000-07:00

leave me alone right now.
this is suchah wrg time.

14weeks and 1day left.

treasure and appreciate.
pls understand how i feel too.

it's not easy for me, i fear.

2007-04-18T17:20:00.000-07:00

I TOTALLY SCREWD MY PRELIM'S CHINESE ORAL!
RARR.

dont ask me how i know it,
i just do.

2007-04-18T07:00:00.000-07:00

i've all along thought that i wasnt bothered much that baby's going NS this year since we've all along only met during the weekends.
so, NS wont be affecting us much either.

Weili has been trying to get me feel the fear of him enlisting to NS soon and stuffs but i've all along laughed it off.
just ytd, when baby told me that his bro has got his enlistment letter,
i felt the sudden fear that things werent gonna be that simple as i thought.
i replied immediately asking what about you?
thk god, his turn hasnt come yet, but i know it's sooner or later.

i fear.

2007-04-16T15:55:00.000-07:00

friday
FRIDAY THE 13TH.
DEFINITELY BAD LUCK!

though it was kindah sway(bad luck) since it was fri the 13th,
it was definitely fun to have such an excitement once awhile in sch.
considering that we're in the better class,
teachers too expect more from us.

what we did was totally insane!
anyway, the usuals of skipping the queue up part after recess since it was mrJoseph's lesson and we girls were just too lazy to change out of our PE shirts, we headed straight back to class.
somehow, our absence got realised and mrSubash came looking for us,
but we ended up playing hide&seek for awhile.
lucky for us, he only felt disappointed and decided not to give us detention.

waited for baby to come before we baked cupcakes.
i've realised that baking is another thing that can bring us both closer, and it too fills his always hungry stomach.

saturday
baby came to pick me up in the late afternoon and we headed over to Vivo.
we had no intention of heading anywhere in particular so we were walking ard aimlessly most of the time.

bumped into a few familiar faces too, Shiting my nursery friend whom i havent seen since we grad from pri sch, Yiwen, Justina and her bf.

i had sudden cravings for salad so we decided to have our dinner at Swensens but they didnt have salands at all, so i settled for something else instead.
he was quite tired yet he still drove me to Changi since i wanted to look at aeroplanes but we headed back soon after cause he was just too tired to continue driving.

the moment we got back to my place,

he crashed right to bed and slpt till almost 12.

sunday
the weekend ended great since i got to meet up with baby, it's rare to be able to see each other since it's always granny's day on sun for them.

met him at City Hall before we went to find Justina and her bf and headed over to Oriental Hotel to meet up with the rest of his family for dinner.

had buffet at the Melt cafe but the food wasnt fantastic at all,

the varieties were quite limited as well.
but i still ate much much more than usual cause Justina said she would strangle me if i were to eat just a little.

baby was so sweet to peel the prawns for me since i was too lazy and didnt wanted to get my hands all messy.

i guess, the only thing that got me excited was my favourite strawberry shortcake.

it still tasted quite good even though the strawberries were sour.

it's was all pairs for our table.
aunty and uncle, Immelia and Daryl, Justina and ZhiXian and baby and i.

baby and i left together with his parents first and they drove me home.

and oh boy, did i got home fast.

baby and i were sliding from side to side at the back of the car.

today
home early since mrsLim isnt in sch,

which means no chem lesson and extra lesson.
since mrsKoh took over the relief period for her maths lesson,

maths extra lesson after sch was also cancelled.

HOMEWK HOMEWK HOMEWK...
alright, i better get down to it now.
eng oral tmr, i better start practising or something.

2007-04-11T05:53:00.001-07:00

i totally screwd up both tests today.
the qns that came out for chem were just totally crazy for us,
and we got mrsLim angry with mixed emotions.
she was having mixed emotions when she saw how everyone cracked our heads apart when the qns were quite straight forward, to her that is.

anyway, honey and i met up with Ivan after sch for our late lunch and slacked over at BK since we are finally free for this week.
Wil Wil came over to find me and we made a short trip to Cold Storage before we seperated in pairs.
accompanied Wil Wil for his super zilian time taking neos alone,
and we left soon after since he got to leave early.

great day!

2007-04-10T19:25:00.000-07:00

i am a very very good girl today, indeed i am.
first of all, i completed my whole chinese test all by myself without copying honey's when she was sitted just by my side.
then, i even stayed back till 4 to continue doing my physics TYS even though our class peer-tutoring session ended at 2.30.

partly cause i was waiting for Felicia's reply to pass me the goodies she brought back for me from Japan, but we ended up not meeting cause she was stuck at RP till forever.
thks girl. loves!
so honey and i went for an impromptu haircut which we intended to for quite sometime but we were just too busy.
so anyway, we were grumbling about how the rain seemed never ending.
it's great to have suchah cool weather but i dread getting drenched.

alright, chem and geog tests tmr.
@__@

2007-04-09T15:45:00.000-07:00

first day of the week and already a crazy one for me,
that's not the end of it too...
the whole week is already packed with lots of tests and remedial.
what a day to start my week!

anyway, today seems to be a rather tiring day.
everyone was complaining and heads were almost hitting on the table just when the first period started.

having sufficient slp, not.
today's bag added to my crazy day,
it was so heavy that the joint of my shoulder felt like giving way.
thk god honey was nice enough to cab home with me, as usual.
love you babe, but i love you even more today =)
i'm glad to be home already, the sudden urge of wanting to crash onto my bed even though i dont have the habit of taking afternoon naps.
oh well. i might consider slacking my day away after i'm done with homewk and grp work stuffs.

fyi. i'm totally not bothered by how you behaved, in actual fact,
i cant be bothered by how you behaved at all.
to me, everything you do seems pretty sick at times.
as ~~innocent~~ as you may seem, it isnt always the case.
i would categorise you as scheming instead, or rather,
you fit so much better under that category of ppl.
i really wonder how your future circle would be like...
if you're wondering who i'm refering to, you might not know,
you might just be the one.

2007-04-08T12:30:00.000-07:00

who on earth wakes up so early at 7.30 in the morning when there'ss totally no plans for the day?
well, i'm the idiot!
seriously speaking, i'm tired but it was hell when i couldnt get back to slp.
it's bloody 7.30 and i'm already awake.

anyway, the weekend didnt went as well as i thought it would.
shouldnt get on it any further but i did enjoyed though,
just that it wasnt as fun as the previous week.

friday
the love came over in the afternoon and we baked cookies,
it was for his mum's birthday that just passed this week.
we were rotting inside my room for an hour plus after trying to decide where to head to for dinner, so we ended up meeting his parents for dinner over at Beach Rd.
the food was great, but the bill that came after... WOOOOO!
it was expensive but i guess it's quite worth it since the food was really good.

before we got home, we dropped by Bugis to get his sis the adidas watch she wanted for her birthday then and home sweet home it was...

the end of my day was bad, just bad.
i asked a qns hoping for the ans i thought i had expected,
but what i got it was just totally unexpected.
i got pretty upset and disappointed.

cried myself to slp.

saturday
met him at city hall and i was in a very foul mood.
he randomly decided to catch a movie and i agreed reluctantly,
i was in no mood for anything to be precise.
whatever!
so we had some food over at TCC while waiting for the movie to start.
thks to the cesear saland with smoked salmon,
my mood got so much better.

caught the movie, TMNT.
it was alright but there are parts of it when baby and i got pretty lethargic.
we headed straight over to Velocity and Square2,
collected my bag from Velocity's outlet after hesitating at the shop for quite sometime.
thk god i got it in the end after baby gave the go-ahead sign,
i totally love it even more when i got home but i burnt a hole in my pocket.
this calls for me to start saving again, i've stopped for quite sometime and i've been very dependant on my ATM card recently.
dinner-ed at LJS and we headed home, but it wasnt long before his parents came to fetch him back.

today
another stay-home sun since Wil Wil is broke and Zheng Zheng did not reply.
probably they'll be free for our coffee session nxt weekend, i hope.
Zheng Zheng hasnt been meeting up as regularly as Wil Wil and i, that busy ass.

alright, rest time before the nieces and nephew come over.

2007-04-05T20:10:00.000-07:00

INFERIOR.
LOW-SELF ESTEEM.
~~MOTIVATED~~

an open heart post.
ppl who knows me, find me someone cheerful even though half of my life is filled troubling with matters which dont matter as much i think they are.
it's all facade, it's just a mask i wear to hide my insecurities.

i guess very few friends have probably seen this side of me.
i've nvr exactly opened this side of me to many,
or rather i felt that it's hard for anyone to understand either.
there wasnt a reason to let anyone know at all.

ever since i'm old enough to know what's right and wrg,
i've chose to put this mask on so ppl ard me would be happy.
but in actual fact, there's so much of me that i'm not happy about.
you'll probably start saying,
you shld be contented with what you have, many arent even that fortunate.
i know i'm fortunate but that's not the point.

i've always felt inferior, regardless of who i'm standing beside with but as i grow older year by year, the feeling inside seems to get unbearable.
seeing friends ard dressing up beautifully heading out, looking great regardless of what they wear.
to me, it feels like billions of needles piercing inside.
it's so hard to look good in something, what more get clothes that fits me perfectly, hiding my flaws and show the best of me to everyone.
i dont have a pretty face, a face ppl will look and realise that i lack nothing inside out.
everyone these days are going,
wow, what a gorgeous body, pretty face etc she has...
gone are the days when ppl ard you truly look at what you really are inside, or maybe such days dont even exisit at all.

i was looking out of the window in class the other day, looking across at the sch opposite.
how those innocent the pri sch kids are,
while they just enjoyed engaging in the activities they're in.
i felt the sudden ache inside and i turned to honey and told her,
i miss pri sch days when nothing much actually bothers us at all.
~~relationship, good-looks, perfect body, pretty face etc...~~
all these werent even in our minds though we envied models on the coverpage of magazines looking so good, but that wasnt occupying much of our thoughts at all.

looking back at past photos taken, i've changed so much.
even my sis thinks that i've lost that innocence i used to have, just trying to keep up with the peer pressure to look good, dress great and be as slim as i can get...

adapting to our surroundings has it's pros and cons.
many of us, teenagers these days are so engrossed in being slim and looking good that it took controlled of our lifes.
we're losing who we really are bit by bit.

there are times i really wished time would slow down,
so we would not regret decisions made.
that is, if only time would slow down for us to treasure those ard us.

2007-04-04T19:35:00.000-07:00

after experiencing one of the worst days ytd,
it got me dreaming about the weirdest thing ever.
it turned into a nightmare, but it was all good and sweet at the end.

the sudden appearence of a certain someone turned everything ard, got me smiling when i got up and the image has been lingering in my mind the whole day.
more like i was dreaming of the impossible, i wouldnt want it to come true either but the dream was just a sweet one to rmb that's all.

last min plan to catch a movie since the bestiie wasnt in the best mood to attend sch, met up at khatib before we randomly decided on Mr Bean's Holiday.
it was super draggy and i wasnt quite interested either, small little parts of it which are quite hilarious but other than that, i didnt felt that the movie was worth watching at all.
yet, looking at how hard she was laughing through the whole movie,
i didnt felt the pinch of spending that 7bucks to accompany her.
it was all worth it.

parted and realised that i've not completed my chem homewk and i'm having i'm-too-lazy-to-study physics test tmr.
oh man. why must the last sch day of this week be suchah turn off.
to make things worst, we've got to stay back for the Adam Khoo's booster session till 5plus.
at least, training is cancelled. thk god!

unlike some selfish ppl, i'm willing to share and try.
it doesnt matter if it isnt the enough, at least it's 100% from me.

alright, i better start on my chem now.
-

i said that i was gonna start on my chem homewk but the thought about the booster session tmr has got me addicted to the song Hero again.
i've been glued infront of the com, repeating the same song for an hour plus and i'm still not sick of it yet...

the sudden inspiration that came.
this is specially dedicated to my honey, the one and only.

2007-04-03T20:20:00.000-07:00

i'm so f***ing pissed off with some immature twenty year old,
that my gastrics are killing me out of nowhere right now.
fyi. it isnt my love i'm referring to.

i totally dont give a damn if that person manages to get a glimpse of this post. listen hard, I DONT BOTHER!
you are and have no right to treat her like this, you are just nobody.

i cant believe it.
i've nvr thought how immature you can be, until today.
i witnessed the impossible of how someone your age could actually handle a relationship prob like this, esp. hurting the girl, her feelings in suchah low down way.

your msges, your shoutings etc...
how isit that you can assume something that had nvr happen,
yet picturing it so beautifully like i'm in a movie catching a woman suducing another.
what kindah trust is this when you totally ignored the explainations given, which are totally nothing but the truth.
like what i said when i called, all i'm doing is to get the darn explaination into the pea brain of yours, you can shout and raise your voice at me for all i care.
my motive is just to get that darn explaination into that pea brain so your immature replys and calls wont hurt the feelings of my friend when all she could do is just cry her heart out knowing that whatever she says is just gonna be a piece of garbage when it reaches that rotten ear of yours which cant seem to listen properly.

what kindah f***ing msg is "you dont call me i dont call you. fair. you dont msg me i dont msg you. fair......"
it sounds so much like a pri sch kid trying to say "you dont friend me, i dont friend you. fair."
come on!
which twenty year old, serving our nation replys like some god damn 3year old kid.

let me make this f***ing clear to you right now.
i know how much effort she has put in to make this relationship a better one.
you on the other hand, is just taking every single thing for granted.
seriously, she deserves better, and not someone so overly-sensitive like you. trust, she has given you. what have you gave her?

you are nothing more than a heartache to her!
-

babe:
whatever that happens, like what i told you just now,
you've got to be mentally, physically and emotionally prepared.
i'm here! always here to listen, to cry or laugh together with you.
seeing you in suchah state right now truely breaks my heart,
i know how much you wanted this to work out.

rmb what i said alright.
when it's time to let go, there's no point hanging on to it when at the end of the day, it's just you that is gonna get hurt.

i love you, i'm sure you know =)

2007-04-02T19:20:00.000-07:00

bestiie and i happened to have nightmare last night,
hers was obviously weird since it's totally impossible for it to happen.
mine on the other hand wasnt as bad, until some unwanted person appeared and made my dream into a nightmare.

met up with Wil Wil after sch and he come over to my hse,
as promised that i would at least allow him to have a nap.
he ended up having no rest at all,
he was busy attending to my shouts every now&then.

i intended to bake a bag of cookies for the girls but well,
my plan failed due to the oven...
we didnt get the hang of it and every batch came up either too soft or too hard.
luckily a few was presentable enough for the girls, not much though.

i guess the main prob lies with the oven since i didnt have much prob when i was baking over at jo's place.
now i know why baby is always laughing at the cookies his sis bakes,
the prob doesnt lies with her at all, it most prob lies with the oven.
since we both happen to be facing the same prob with the end product.

anyway, Wil Wil and i were totally going crazy.
we were numb and sore after trying every batch of cookies that came out, we even started playing whacking asses like insane kids.

okay, i'm officially going to fall sick soon.
the signs are getting more obvious as days passed.
I ~~LOVE~~ HAVING SORETHROAT.

2007-04-01T15:50:00.000-07:00

HAPPY APRIL FOOLS DAY.

yesterday
we made a wasted trip over to Marina Square cause sits left for TMNT was lousy, so we decided that it's wiser that we skipped the movie.

i got frustrated when the top i wanted to get from Topshop ran out of my size and when baby didnt want to get me the small balloon i've been bugging him to get me.
so it was double dose of frustration for me,
i even vented out at him at every single thing he did.

we had our late lunch at Billy Bombers cause he insisted that Jack's Place's serving was pathetic and he wanted BIlly Bombers instead, and it ended up with both of us not being able to finish our food.
for those who've been to Billy Bombers,
i'm sure you know how large their serving are.
anyway, by the time i've finished my creamy mushroom soup and sips of smoothie, my tummy was already hitting the limit.
lucky for me that my steak isnt as huge as baby's burger.

we took a aimless walk over to Suntec before he dragged me to Carefore.
after a long grumble from me, we headed back to his place for a short nap before we caught the soccer match on ESPN.

ManU against Blackburn, 4-1.

afterwhich, he sent me home together with the oven.

today
daddy was shocked to see me still wide awake when he came home ard 2plus.
i was having a headache yet it was impossible for me to fall aslp.
so i got up, sat on my bed and read the newpaper.

daddy came up to me and asked whether i'm bothered by anything, thinking that i had something on my mind and thus unable to slp.
to make him feel assured, i decided to off the lights and tried to slp.
thank god i fell aslp ard 3plus,
but i was still having the headache when i got up.

it isnt even liked i slpt through the whole day or whatsoever,
i was totally wide awake ard 8plus.
oh well. the last day of the week before sch starts again,
i dread to have this kindah feeling, esp. since mon will be a very long day.

i shall go complete my homewk now.

2007-03-29T21:40:00.000-07:00

not gonna update much bout this week since i cant rmb much about what exactly happen either.

pics taken on tues.

class phototaking day and Soul Garden Gathering.

anyway, we got qns by mrsKoh for not going for the cca phototaking ytd.

training was quite slack as compared to usual since we're graduating soon, so we are training the sec1(s) instead.

nice and interesting juniors as compared to last two batches, which is good. i can see that they are seriously keen to learn.

home straight aft since zheng zheng decided to meet me some other day.

we're both very crazy. our scandalous affair.

the weekend is near, very near.

cant wait for another great weekend with the love.

2007-03-26T18:20:00.000-07:00

today is the most random day ever.

for starters, honey and i were having the most random conversation ever about food, desserts and Soul Garden's prawns before we met up for sch.
my bag weighed like a tonn and the weather wasnt helping much.
the sky was so dark and it rained the moment we reached khatib.
so much for the start of the week, it gave me monday blues.

sch was @$&#@#& and it felt like sch was nvr gonna end.
we had extra lessons for chem than maths continuously right after,
without having any breaks inbetween at all.
we only ended at almost 3, with a huge sigh of relieve.

that was the start of another random crazyness from us, seven sisters.
i was doing the ultimate most ugliest stuffs ever,
walking and talking like some nerdy ass with thick glasses on.
weili was going crazy in her very own sampat(aunty) way and
steph was going ard biting our arm to feel the different feeling it gave.
the rest couldnt hold on any longer and burst out laughing.
that's the greatest thing about having a crazy bunch of friends.

accompanied theon to Popular after sch and he was saying the most random things ever the moment he saw something, linking nothing to something to laugh about.
he got me bursting out laughing throughout the whole time,
another ever-so-crazy bro of mine.
i had cravings for sweet stuff, so we headed to Cold Storage to get them but upon seeing how long the queue was.
it made no sense to queue for just two boxes of chocs, so i decided to give it a miss even though i'm still very much craving for it.
he's suchah sweet pie to walk me back home even though we're staying at opposite ends of Yishun.
he came in and slacked for abit before heading home for tuition.

another great day ahead tmr it shall be.
a few of us are meeting up for a sumptuous buffet lunch at Soul Garden.

I THANK GOD FOR THE MANY GREAT FRIENDS I HAVE!
through all those up(s) and down(s), they nvr fail to make my day.

2007-03-25T01:15:00.000-07:00

i wasnt exactly in the bestest mood when the love came, he was laughing at me when i told him that i was having a wardrobe malfunction.
i seriously had nothing to wear, and he wasnt helping at all.
i got rather pissed off and i threatened not to head out at one point,
scaring him obviously.
he, in turn threatened to catch the movie with some other girl instead.

oh well. when i finally found something to wear,
we headed over to our weekly hangout place, Marina Square.
roamed aimlessly after collecting our 7pm, Stomp The Yard tickets.
i've got to say this, Chris Brown looked so cute in the movie,
so was Ne-Yo, he looked super duper attractive. *drools
if you're someone whose into dance like stepping,
this is the kind of show you must not miss.
4.5/5 cupcakes it is.

we kindah argued inbetween the show,
but all was good after awhile's time.
dinner-ed at Imperial Kitchen which made us lost our appetite the moment the food was served.
my all time favourite xiao long bao tasted like crap, other dishes as well.
since we had nowhere else to head to,
he brought me to view aeroplanes as requested by me.
*i'm a pampered girl.
but before that, he drove past Geylang and brought me to look at prostitutes, than off to Changi Village area in search for gays too.

a sudden msg that came from the bestiie totally made both him and i laughed our ass off.
it was shocking and totally unexpected but it didnt fail to make the end of my day even better than it alreeady was.
what was the msg about?
sorry. it's private and confidential, our very own private joke.

got back home at 11plus and he stayed till 1 before going to fetch his sis.
so i'm doing a quick update while waiting for him to get home safely.
how nice it would be if every weekend ends as smoothly as today.

i'm just glad that my hectic week did turned out well in the end.
thks to none other, baby and bestiie.

2007-03-24T13:30:00.000-07:00

OMG.
i'm trying so !#&%!%&# hard to lose those excess fats that i seriously dont need, but my mum on the other hand is trying to feed me more food.
unhealthy food to be precise!

anyway, life hasnt been considering good lately other than getting back in contact with a few long lost peeps that i truely miss after so long.
time is definitely the factor that drew us apart.
anyway, i'm just glad that we're back in contact now.

so it was an extra half an hour more of tuition today, maths.
going crazy? not exactly, more like going insane.
it's the guilt i'm feeling, i've not even started revision for Os yet.
god dammit!
i seriously need to get some work started before i totally run out of time when the june holis come.

the love's coming to fetch me later in the late afternoon.
more updates when i'm back home.

2007-03-22T16:30:00.000-07:00

HAPPY 18MTHS MY LOVE.

oh well. meet-the-parents-session wasnt as bad as i thought.
daddy's reaction after he saw my results were totally unexpected and relieving, but the results on the other hand is one major disaster.

it's super embarrassing but i'm gonna blog out anyway.
this Common Test 1's results is definitely a screw up.

Eng: 48.5
Chi: 37
Maths: 44.5
Sci: 48
Combined Humans: 58.5
P.O.A: 53

this love is eternity
this love is just you and me
this love goes wherever you go cause i'll follow too

2007-03-21T18:00:00.000-07:00

i nvr felt like i ~~hated~~ YOU so much until today.

love and hate collides.

2007-03-20T15:55:00.000-07:00

this week is probably one of the craziest week,
and it's not even anywhere near to over yet!

family issues being one of the major thing,
my relationship that seems to be taking it's mthly turn-over,
disastrous studies taking my life away...

[arent we supposed to at least enjoy our life before we collasped even without knowing it ourselves?]

good news and bad news.
i would definitely love to just look at the good news alone,
but everything can be looked at a different angle,
which means i've got no choice but to accept both good and bad.

good news shall stay as a secret for now. selected few only.

as much as i hate the sch for delaying the release of our report cards,
i cant deny it somehow gave me a chance to enjoy my holis even though i fell ill.
at least, there's no reason to be grounded unlike last year.
getting grounded for one whole mth is no joke!
anyway, i've managed to keep mum for my Common Test 1 results since it wasnt anywhere near to acceptable at all.
oh well. just like an old chinese saying, zi shi bao bu zhu huo,
which means that something cant be kept a secret for long.
my time is just up. meet-the-parents-session on thurs, godblessme.
i aint exactly sure how everything will turn out but i'm hoping for the worse, i always do.

it's seems like it's becoming more like a routine for me,
staring blankly at the board during POA, copying i-have-no-idea-what stuffs.
yet, it doesnt seem to bother me somehow, until today.
i started having this unknown stress,
the sudden gush of pressure inside my head.
it got me feeling very disturbed,
i'm not even exactly sure whether i'm even ready for Os this year.
=(

something made my day slightly better, something very unexpected.
mdmLu praised me during MT lesson, and i was surprised to see that i somehow managed to improve my chinese grades.
it's shocking, from the bo chap and always slping attitude to someone who'll ask for the chinese meaning and even taking down notes.
i knew i wanted to improve my chinese grades, but i've nvr felt so desperate to get something right until i realised that i'm a goner for POA.
i've always looked down on chinese, but it seems like the only subject that is able to save my grades from going way too high to get into poly.

i bet you guys have no idea how badly i want to score good grades.
i've always envy those lucky/handworking kids who'll have no worries when it comes to tests and exams.
since young, tests and exams have always been the devil to me,
something that will turn out so wrg no matter how hard i try.
it just wouldnt seem right and unknowingly i've slowly let it slipped away.

it's so hard to concentrate, so hard to focus.
at the end of the day, those grades will just be compared to some smart kids.

-
BANISHED RIGHT DOWN.
why do you always have to disappoint me?
am i just nvr good enoough?

2007-03-19T05:58:00.001-07:00

i'm stressed, i'm @&$@%$&# STRESSED!

i called to hear that voice of comfort, hoping.
but it always disappoints me at the end.
what's the big deal? isnt it always the case.
having this fucking high hope and getting banished right down.

i thought it would be slightly easier since,
i mentioned what the fucking prob was.

LEAVE ME ALONEEEEE!
why isit so hard to understand?
why?!

2007-03-17T12:50:00.000-07:00

I'M STILL SICK!
more like on the verge of losing my voice soon.

the girls are also wondering how i could fall sick again so soon,
when i just recovered on CNY.
deprieving myself from all those once-a-year goodies =(
daddy has been laughing at me, saying
"you're a netballer. how can you always fall sick and feel cold so easily?"

anyway, i'm been feeling terrible these couple of days.
coughing so badly in the middle of the night without being able to slp soundly and the worst thing is,
the holis are ending in just 1day.

baby is sweet, so sweet to come my place to have his nap while i was coughing my guts out and feeling feverish.
no doubt that i was pampered after he had sufficient rest that is.

plans for today is shifted to nxt week due to the sickly me.
will be heading over to baby's place to slack cum slp.
i'll have 100% attention from him, why not? =))

2007-03-15T19:00:00.000-07:00

had a long conversation with ben bro last night via msn,
it's been quite sometime and we had so much catching ups to do.
as well as luana, that party animal!
we managed to have a short conversation before she went to party.
dont forget girl. our date during the june holis.

anyway, something got me pretty irritated.
not only that, i found that the person was down right rude.
i dislike chatting with ppl who replies in suchah manner.
where are your manners?

enough of that...
i'm still sick, and that spells that i probably wont be enjoying much of my weekends before sch reopens.
loads of homewk still not completed yet, i might be dead.

oh well. nothing much cheers me up than the fact that i'm seeing baby tmr!

2007-03-14T14:50:00.000-07:00

i bet i had too much fun ytd that i've fallen ill now,
couldnt slp through the whole night cause my throat was irritating me.

anyway, mrSUN made a fool out of us ytd.
we met up so early just to catch a good spot and have a great tan but there wasnt any sunlight till we were ready to leave for our movie, but that didnt deprived us from the fun.

it's probably fate that we saw shawn and his friends and we joined them since all of us didnt manage to get the slightest bit of sunlight.
we were crazy playing vollyball and captain's ball and boy,
we had so much that it didnt bothered us much that mrSUN wasnt out.

some random pics.

since Norbit's tickets were sold out, we caught Rocky Balboa instead.
it's a very good show, true meanings caught in it too.

"the older i get, the more things i've got to leave behind"- by Rocky Balboa
"if this is something you wanna do, if this is something you got to do, than do it. fighters fight!"-by Marie

met baby at cityhall to accompany him to his router over at SimLim but it was raining so heavily that we couldnt walk over.
decided to have dinner at Pastamania first while waiting for the rain to stop.
we were walking ard after that and i spotted a very cute but huge baby elephant, and he wanted to get it for me.
looking at the price and finding the price too steep, i got the smaller version instead.
afterwhich, we headed over to SimLim to get his router when the rain had stopped.

the whole bus journey back was fabulous.
i was exactly like a little girl, hugging on to Dumbo and lying on his shoulder.
my day ended great!
nothing could have been better,
than seeing him after a long and tiring day of fun.

2007-03-12T01:11:00.001-07:00

i'm so proud of myself, i did 3hrs of clearing part of my homewk today.
i even tried doing my chinese test paper,
until i reached the compre part which i have totally idea.
anyway, lil bitsy bit of homewk cleared but there's lots more to go.

tmr, my rest day cum spending time with the bestiie and the love.
oh well. to be in fact, we'll both be meeting our love aft that.

i cant wait!
since it's been ages since we last visited,
and the tram already in progress, we both may be mountain turtles there.
BESTIIE, REST EARLY!
it's gonna be a long, tiring and crazy day for us both.

2007-03-11T21:00:00.000-07:00

despite slping late last night,
i woke up pretty early this morning at 8plus.
anyway, i realised recently that the later i slp, the earlier i'm waking up.

day, time and venue settled with the bestiie.
SENTOSA, HERE WE COME...
it's high time i get my tann colour back,
since the last time we went for tanning was like mths before Ns.
afterwhich, we'll be catching a movie over at town if ben's joining us and maybe i'll be meeting up with the bf.
i'm so excited right now!
it's been ages since the bestiie and i both spent quality time out together.

oh man, will tues hurry come?
i cant wait.
-

it's a surprised that mummy decided to cook dinner today,
rather than the usuals of packing food back from outside.
i'm lost for words, i'm just glad to have eaten home cooked food since the last time she cooked was like ages ago.
i ate till my max, so full and bloated right now but i enjoyed myself.

random conversations with mum and dad,
and i tried bringing up the clubbing thing to see their reaction.
surprisingly, no big hoohaa or what-so-ever...
but i gave my word to daddy though,
i will only start clubbing when i'm officially done with Os.
frankly speaking, i'm not into clubbing either,
but will check it out and have a taste of it.
at the end of the day, i guess i would still prefer pubbing instead.

If i kissed you
Would you lose track of time
Would you feel a surge of happiness
Running up your spine
Would you run naked in the street with a tattoo of my name on your behind..

2007-03-10T23:18:00.000-08:00

yesterday
having PE with the 4Es ytd was just great,
we didnt even have to run 2.4km to burn off the carbs..
we had a very competitive game of captain's ball for an hour plus.

i had little time to think bout what was supposedly bothering me.
last day before the holis starts definitely meant lots of homewk got flashed to us, which is pretty nerve wreaking since it's only 1week for goodness sake.

anyway, we talked things out.
i intended to keep my mouth shut but the moment i saw him,
i totally felt like breaking down.
though it's very unlikely for me to beat ard the bush, but i prompted till,
i guess it was pretty obvious what i wanted him to confess.
as strange as it seemed, things were talked through in a very calm way and eventually was solved in a very unexpected way too.
whatever it is, i'm just great that things are pretty much back to the way it is.

as a gf, it's definitely impossible for me to not control him.
but from what i've experienced with him through this period of time,
i'm learning to let him have his freedom bit by bit..
i'm trying very hard to overcome what has been a barrier inside me,
it has more or less affected our relationship,
but i'm not gonna let it anymore.

i love ya baby!

today
i was woken up a couple of times this morning but am not pissed by it.
what are friends for, if you're always away?

felicia darling: things may not be going the way you expected things shld, but dont give yourself too much pressure to make things perfect. certain things are better to take a step at a time. dont worry bout bothering me with your smses and calls. no matter what, i'm always here to listen =)

was supposed to meet him at 2 but he's too tired to wake up,
so our plans for today are pushed back an hour later.
though i feel pretty irritated by it, i'm closing one eye.

will be heading to town to get a customised cap for my newphew,
and maybe satisfy my TCC's strawberry shortcake craving i'm having for the past 2weeks.

will update more when i get home.
-

finally able to update since i'm waiting for baby to reach home.
today is probably a crazy day since we can be good for a moment and pissed at each other the nxt, and it gets pretty funny how we can laugh at each other and suddenly start ignoring one another.

anyway, i've finally gotten my nephew's cap done.
some crazy pics taken with him when we were cam whoring in my room.

2007-03-09T07:00:00.000-08:00

as difficult as it is to keep the smile on even though i'm feeling the opposite way,
it's for the better that i continue hiding my emotions this way.

i may seem like i'm running away from reality,
but isit this the best way to keep what's supoosed to be perfect, perfect?

oh well, it's the last day of sch before the march holis.
i shall keep myself occupied the whole time in sch today,
run as fast for my 2.4km like i've nvr did,
just so all these wont keep resurfacing at the back of my head.

it hurts, it really does.
but i dont want it to affect...

TIME FOR SCH!

2007-03-08T17:00:00.000-08:00

I ~~HATE YOU~~!
YOU'RE SUCHAH LIAR!

you dont deserve my trust at all...
i feel so cheated.

i may have brought this upon myself but i dont think i deserve to be cheated in suchah way.
i will close up, and pretend like nothing ever happened.

my tears will be covered up with a smile.

2007-03-08T15:50:00.000-08:00

no right to know, no right to ask,
no right to feel, no right to hurt,
no right to care, no right for everything...

i'll keep my emotions closed.
so no one will understand me, it's better this way.
i'm sorry but everything that i do seems so wrg.
i guess it's just the period of time whereby everything seems to be going against me.

why do all good things come to an end?

2007-03-07T01:42:00.001-08:00

random post.

i guess it's already a known fact that ppl enter and leave your life.
ut have anyone thought much bout the ones who used to be close yet right now, you may not be the one who the person will turn to anymore?

i feel so...
as in, there are different periods of time when i'm close to a certain someone but after a few mths time, somehow things just dont seem to be the case.

anyway, i just wanna do a shout out to ppl whom i've not been very much in contact for quite sometime.
you guys are not forgotten!

these are the few who made my days lasted like forever,
he ones, who were always ever-so-willing to listen to my probs.

Immelia: thks for those advises that you gave, it made me grow through the rough patch of my relationship. just like what you always tell me, no one else will know exactly much it hurts other than you. days spent with you were always great from the start till the end!

Wilson: bro! i guess, you kindah watch me grow since i knew you all the way back since sec1 when i was still that chabby girl. nvr will i ever feel bored with your comapny, and i'm always looking forward to the nxt meeting up. see you soon for our coffee session!

Terence: i guess our closeness was very random, just like how random our topics are when we chat. you made me rmbed the great times spent, and i definitely miss those times chatting online with you.

Joann: though we may not be as close as we were in lower sec, i do miss those wonderful times hanging ard with you, tina and joyce after trainings. those times when we'll head over to J8 just so we could have MOS burger and just slack ard. you made me realise so much things that i may not get to understand, i've always thought that life seemed like an easy road and it'll always be filled with miracles, not.
without you, there wont be a wonderful relationship for me to hold on to, thks for making me face my inner self, and pursuing what i really wanted. there's alot that words just cant describe but i just want to let you know that i'm still here like before. i may not be the first you'll turn to, but i dont mind being the last... i love ya babe!

Jackie: bud bud! i'm so glad to have found suchah a friend like you, someone who'll cheer me up and make me forget my probs when you're ard, just like the rest of them. sorry to always be crying to you when i'm feeling lost, but i do miss our sentosa trip. better make more time for me!

Pinkie & Ducky: though i've just known you guys recently, but no doubt that you both did turn my life into a better one. hanging out with you guys is just fun, exciting and filled with non-stop laughter. thks for being there =)

Yanhan: thks for those times when you'll listen to my sobs and make me look at a positive side of the situation, without you too, i wouldnt have lasted this long in my relationship. i guess i've probably irritate the shit out of you during times when i'm apart from him but you're still here for me. i love ya bro! and i know you know that.

Bekah & Sheena: crazy mugging sessions, slacking at my place and nothing nothing but feeding the mosquitos at the reservior just to cam whore. i miss both you, my crazy friends!

Luana: times working with you was great. though we're busy working towards to the future we want, the fact that i know you through our job, i feel that i'm lucky. i miss our 7-eleven breakfast sandwich and Orange Julies nachos which we'll munch non-stop when the counter was darn empty, and to keep ourselves entertained, we even started playing Bingo till we were dead bored. i miss ya lady!

emotional.

2007-03-06T04:34:00.001-08:00

last min arrangement to meet up with felicia after sch.
cabbed home to change up cause mrFoo dismissed us late as usual.

anyway, accompanyed felicia to RP to check out the course she's been posted to.
like what ppl have been telling me, that sch isnt actually very good.
they told us to check out their website no matter what we've asked,
regardless enquires about the CCA(s) available or their courses etc...
a very bad impression left on felicia and she kindah hesitated entering RP, so we went over to SP at a very last min to check out the other courses she could appeal.

she wasnt very lucky but it wasnt a wasted trip for us either.
making the whole trip worthwhile,
we decided to slack over at SP's Mac while snacking.
it was econs since we last met,
so we did quite abit of catching ups and stuffs.

we left quite early cause she's having her dance lesson and i needed to reach home early to avoid the folks from nagging at me since there's sch tmr.

it was great day i had with her today...
contented and asking for nothing more than just quality time spent with friends.

i love this down-to-earth babe.

2007-03-05T02:10:00.000-08:00

somehow i felt exceptionally happy today,
i seriously have no ans to that but i'm glad my day was good.

the girls and i are troubling over where to head to during the march holis since C clinic and Fashionbar both checks IDs.
which means, we have very few chances of even trying to get in.
will 18 hurry come? i cant wait to chill my night away with the girls.

anyway, no lunch and dinner since no ones home.
mummy is finally back to work and the usuals of having the whole hse to myself.
it's great, just that i have no one to make food for me to eat when i'm hungry.
i'm starving right now,
and baby is rubbing in tempting me with doughnuts.

i'm craving so much for 3 very sinful dessets right now,

doughnuts, cupcakes and strawberry shortcake from TCC.

dont they just look sinful!

too bad, i've got sweet tooth that cant take me away from delicacies like these.

not because of who i am
but because of what you've done
not because of what i've done
but because of who you are...

2007-03-04T22:00:00.000-08:00

a quick update before i'm off to bed.

got to bed quite late cause i was still at baby's place ard 12,

had what-i-thought was sufficient slp before i went to meet andy over at civic.

mugged, yukked and he kindah confided some stuffs,

waited for that lazy yisong to come before we left slightly aft.

we headed over to Grassroots since the guys were craving for pool,

hanged ard for an hour or so before they finally gave in and stopped.

we went to J8's Sakae cause i was whining so much that i was hungry and i had cravings for only Sakae for dinner and nothing else.

they gave in to me so much today, how great is that man.

love the guys to bits&pieces!

yisong and i was bloated aft we're done cause we ate too much,we could have actually eaten more, just that andy didnt like sushi much...

2007-03-03T14:30:00.000-08:00

almost all of the papers are back, except one which is SS.
nothing much other than saying that my results this term are by far the worst i've ever gotten in my 4yrs plus in sec sch.
definitely major disaster with my results which mostly are in red.
get the picture?

oh well, 3weeks of tuition before was cancelled by me and another 2weeks more of tuition cancelled by sharon cause she has something on.
which means, i'll be lagging behind cause i'm not understanding much from sch.
WILL SOMEONE HELP ME?!

mugging session with andy and yisong over at causeway tmr,
i hope i'll get some things done and stop yukking away.

will be meeting my love later on in the late afternoon,
since he's busy with grocery shopping together wth his granny.

i shall continue with my update when i'm home,
provided i'm not too tired and lazy since i wont be home early.

2007-03-02T20:45:00.000-08:00

It's a long road
When you face the world alone
No one reaches out a hand
For you to hold
You can find love
If you search within yourself
And the emptiness you felt
Will disappear...

2007-03-02T17:30:00.000-08:00

i shall do a short update since baby is enjoying a cosy nap along with the cooling weather outside.

generally, other than having a great time in class with nesaar,
daughter and dhanya during recess, chinese remedial with the guys,
always having my bestiie with me no matter what happens and being able to see baby today, the rest of everything just sucked.

thanks for making my day, and those who didnt,
i've learnt to not give a damn bout it anymore for i dont deserve such treatment.

ben bro made me realised something very impt today and i'm glad i'll nvr have to fret over anything cause he's always here for me to confide to.
you really shldnt feel bad about this long term.
i found my 'true friends' only much later on in life.
it's different for everyone, along the way you must filter idiots that dont help your situation because you deserve better than this.
ppl enter and leave your life, you just need to keep the close ones closer.
I LOVE YA BESTIIE.
THANKS AND SORRY ABOUT THAT STUPID THING TODAY.

i hesitated before agreeing.
i know i've done my part, i may not be the perfect friend,
at least i tried my best to hold on to our friendship.
yet, i seem to be someone invisible at the end of the day.
i truely wish to know what i am to you ppl.
just like what nesaar told me, why do i need to cry over ppl who dont bother when i've got ppl ard me who truely cares.

i've thought about it so much that it was so hard to control my emotions.
i was so naive to think that apprecitaing me would be the case of my effort, but thanks for making me realised that it was all a waste of effort.
thanks again, you ppl made me saw who my true friends were.

i'm nothing better than a puppet.
naive and dumb.

2007-03-01T20:30:00.000-08:00

the whole field trip we had today was definitely great.

we had lots of fun enjoying each other's company going from place to place.

mrLow even gave us a treat at TCC,

even though there were about 20plus of us, it wasnt cheap at all.

i'm actually quite lazy to upload everything,

so i shall update just a few random ones.

i was totally the opposite on our way back,

was kindah looking out of the window stoning while listening to some emo-ish chinese songs.

there was a sudden emptyness that i felt,

realising that even though my life is filled with my family,

a great bunch of friends and not forgetting my love.

yet somehow, there are times when i feel absolutely lonely.

it's as if i had no one to lean on to, no one to understand my emotions...

sometimes, it just seems more than what i can take.

hidden emotions.

2007-02-28T21:40:00.000-08:00

it was a relieved even though the last paper was a crazy one.
who's able to complete a 10page paper within 45mins?
whatever it is, it's all over and done with.
godblessus.

it was definitely quality time spent with the bestiie after sch.
headed over to sem to get what we were short of before cabbing back to my place.
we did lots of nice goodies for the girls and not forgetting my baby.
i was telling her how much this will bond us together closer,

and maybe we shld try doing this like ard once a mth or so.

which means, we need to learn more new recipies to try out.

sch has always been a bitch, with homewk and other stuffs,
24hrs a day seems unlikely to be enough for anyone.

we were nibbling while doing a whole lot of goodies covered with choco.

at the end of everything, we ate so much choco that we were so full.

being high on choco makes us extra sweet!

my love for my girls.

2007-02-27T14:50:00.000-08:00

today's papers were suchah mess as well.
was kindah prepared for my SS paper even though i did only a slight bit of revision ytd.
since it was one of the only few topics that caught my interest,
i wasnt quite stressed out over it except POA.
but the moment i got the paper,
i totally got stuck for like a precious 5mins.
at an instant, my mind just suddenly went blank,
i got quite freaked out for a while before i started on it.

i hope my qns2 will save my ass this time since everyone kindah used up two or more foolscap while i only used up one for both qns.

as for POA, it was as usual.

thought i've mastered the slightest bit of it at least since i've been listening in class these few days taking down necessary notes,

but reality is harsh.

the moment i got the paper i was so enthu only to realise that i totally forgot everything honey taught me just right before the paper.

i guess i'm having a very high chance to score zero for this paper.

i bet the teachers are gonna force me to drop POA looking at how bad my POA record has been all along, even though i've sumitted the form saying that i wish to take 6subs for Os.

enough of exams...

last paper tmr which is chem and i'll be free finally! i cant wait!

honey will be coming over and we'll be doing some chocolatey snacks for the girls.

plus a field trip on thurs as promised by mrLow,

we get to skip training and have fun learning about the past of our country.

who says that sch is boring?

i miss my boo.

2007-02-26T15:25:00.000-08:00

i intended to update only when common test ends, which is on wed,
but i cant wait till than to blog this out.
not like it's impt at all anyway, i just needah rant it out.

so, how was my papers today?
i probably screwd my papers up i guess,
i know nothing bout looking at the graph to find the darn frequency to slove the bloody qns.
to add on, most of the qns needed me to find the frequency before i could even solve it and i couldnt figure it out even when the time was up.
that's physics, so what bout maths?
maths was alright/difficult.
there were qns i've totally not seen before,
as in the concept needed to solve it was like a total stranger to me.
i only started to relax when i realised those strange qns were not only unsolveable to me but also the others.
seriously, what are the teachers thinking?
giving us qns/concept they've not taught before.

anyway, that wasnt exactly what i intended to rant about...
so this is it, have anyone tried snatching a cab from you?
i bet, almost everyone has experienced that before.

my experienced today is totally hilarious/pissing since that what-i-consider-to-be a old man (not those ahpek, he's still strong enough to run ard those kind) tried snatching a cab from honey and i after sch.
it isnt like we stood infront of him on purpose,
that's the exact same spot we hire for cab every single time.
it was raining quite heavily and i lifted my hand when i saw a cab came,
and he immediately did the same thing and looked at me as if i was trying to steal something precious from him.
being the very kiasu type, i expected him to stand slightly infront of me if he has the intention to piss me off but guess what he did?
he literally walked all the way by the road side so near that he could have reached the mrt station in less than 5mins just so that he could hire a cab before i did.
as expected, i was cursing and swearing at him but i ended up getting a cab before him.
even when i boarded the cab, i couldnt stop grumbling at how pissed i was but was laughing at that kiasu old man cause i still hired a cab before him.

oh well, POA and SS papers tmr.
will it be GOOD LUCK or BETTER STUDY HARD TODAY for me?
i would say godblessme instead.

2007-02-25T14:40:00.000-08:00

friday
baby came over my place before we headed over to his place in the late afternoon for his mum's secondary sch CNY gathering.
i've got no idea why i was invited but i still went over anyway.
lucky that immelia was there too, i had comapany!

helped ard a little before immelia came from work,
and all we did was eat, tv-ing and slacking ard.
left after everyone left and got home only ard 1plus.

saturday
met baby at city hall and headed over to Marina Square for a movie.
caught the movie Protege, and it's actually a very nice show,
as exciting and happening as the trailer.
i'll rate it 4/5 cupcakes.

slacked ard and was clueless what to have for dinner,
so we walked over to Suntec's basement.
the usuals of walking 2rounds and ending up in Swensens.
since i had no proper meal the whole day,
i had no appetite at all, so i ordered a bowl of salad.
i had a shock when it came, cause it's serving was as big for 2persons.
baby wasnt gonna help me with the greens,
so i took my own sweet time enjoying and it was long before the whole bowl was empty.

since uncle was at Suntec's convention centre as well,
we waited for him and they sent me home.

i'mma happy girl cause i got accesories for myself since i couldnt find a nice bag.

today
i have no idea how but i've to get down to my books by hook or by crook,
cause i've having physics and maths paper tmr.

GOOD LUCK TO ME!

2007-02-22T15:20:00.000-08:00

HAPPY 17TH MTHS.
on this very date every mth, comes with much hope and hints.
this mth, i chose to stay with the pact i made to myself,
which i could nvr once keep, but i will this time.
to not bother and just shut my mouth.
realising that i'm too tired to put in much hope, what more hints.
when it may not be exactly as impt at the end of the day.

it was quite a day for me at sch when something kindah got my feelings running.
all i did was stare blankly at the whiteboard for quite sometime,
blocking out everything mdmLu was teaching in class.
but i guess, i'll keep things behind closed doors.
whatever happened really got my emotions on the run,
resulting in the very emo-ish me in class.
i couldnt help, i couldnt block those _____,
in order to hide, i went to the only place i could, the toilet.
honey still found me in the end, i cant hide much from that babe too.
she knows me too well...

anyway, common tests officially starts tmr but i'm seriously in no mood to get down to my books.
thank god tmr's only the language papers.
i'm feeling so emo-ish that i'm gonna make jelly for the girls later on,
hope i'll feel much better after.

2007-02-21T17:00:00.000-08:00

TRUE FRIENDS.

in times of trouble,
in times of sadness,
during times when all i need is comfort...

who will be here for me?

will you?

2007-02-20T16:45:00.000-08:00

girl...
i seriously wonder what's your fucking prob to crack that lazy brain of yours.
to think i've been that dumb all along to forgive those childish acts of yours.
but, i guess i might appreciate if you start being more original,
more of yourself, rather than always trying to be someone else.

I FUCKING HATE YOU,
PIECE OF WORTHLESS ASS POOP.

2007-02-20T16:06:00.000-08:00

a CNY nvr to rmb.

dont ask me why, it's just like that.

2007-02-14T23:05:00.000-08:00

My Sweet, Sickly Valentine's Day
my sweet love came to pick me up from sch and
boy, did he suprised me with a huge bouquet of flowers.

he fetched me back so i could get prepared for our date.
since i had sudden cravings for Sakae Sushi,
he pampered me by drivng me to Changi Airport T2's Sakae Sushi.

i was quite upset that he had spent so much money on the flowers,
but on the account that he had the thought for it,
i decided to pamper him back by treating him Sakae Sushi.

we strolled ard before heading over to Suntec area,
looking for a suitable ring for us both.
baby definitely knows how to pamper me!
we finally decided to go back to MOSHI MOSHI to get our rings.

afterwhich, most of our time was spent chilling out at CoffeeBean.
until, baby decided to bring me catch those aeroplanes again.
we came back early due to the flu i'm having,
but at the end of the day,
it was quality time spent with the love one.

I LOVE MY CUTE BABY!

MY SWEET VALENTINE.

2007-02-13T16:35:00.000-08:00

anyone already in the mood for V.day?
i'm not sure bout you guys but i'm already so in the mood for V.day!

time passed exceptionally fast in sch today.
maybe partly due to sch ending at 1.15 too i guess.
had two free periods cause mrFoo was absent, as usual.
one of the periods was a free period but the other got taken by mrTeo,
the plastic looking principal of ours.
had a talk about the Os results which all other teachers kept repeating,
so no exception for the principal as well.
his talk actually ended early,
so he allowed us to wonder ard till sch was officially over.

headed back to yishun with honey to get our eyebrows done,
and we had oyster omelette which cost 6bucks but didnt felt like we ate anything when we finished everything up cause it was so little.
afterwhich, that sweet babe accompanied me to get my roses for the girls for tmr.
yes yes, TMR IS VALENTINE'S DAY!
took sometime to choose between what kindah rose i wanted and which bouquet was prettier before i purchased it.

my pretty roses for the girls.

i seriously cant wait for tmr.
and i'm so excited to see that dumb look of honey's when she receives her surprise...

immelia is seriously too stressed out.
we've been nudging each other for almost an hour,
cause she's apparently too stress at work now.
only by nudging like mad girls will keep her stressfree.
logical?
totally not! but at least it keeps her happy =)

2007-02-13T06:40:00.000-08:00

dear friend,
if you understand how i'm feeling,
you'll realise the thoughts i've been having these days.

no other word than horrible.

2007-02-11T16:15:00.000-08:00

actual plans for today was supposed to head out to study,
but due to a certain reason i've decided not to go...
so my day is spent slacking ard and awaiting for CNY.
i'm so excited, and i cant wait to meet up with the cousins!

a special shoutout to thank my cousin, jordan,
for finding Akon's I Wanna Love You for me.
*as requested

2007-02-10T23:45:00.000-08:00

yesterday
the outcome of the match was totally surprising to us all,
nvr would we ever thought that we would beat them.
it was a very tough match, but a great game to end with =)

everyone basically went for the match feeling very lethargic but we were leading for the first quarter and i guess,
that's probably what got us hanging on till the end of the game.
as for the last quarter,
everyone got very tensed since it was a draw,
we were more afraid of losing cause everyone was hanging on with injuries from past matches.
when the time was up, it was totally like a dream came true when we realised that we won them by just one point.

it wasnt a win without a price to pay,
most of us fell like nobody's business and weili got her ankle sprained.
as for myself, it was added injuries to my already-injured kneecap and lower back.
just like what mrsKoh told me after the match,
it's high time that i stop playing competitively and recuperate.

the sweet bf came to meet me and we got dinner before heading back to my place.
it's good to know that after everything that happened this week,
i'm still able to be embraced by him.

today
meeting baby later for my CNY shopping...

i better start preparing or i'll be late.
will update more when i'm back home.
-

the shopping turned out pretty great even though i got myself only one top/dress, but i love it so much that even though the price is quite steep, i still got it anyway.

cant wait for CNY!

2007-02-09T07:00:00.000-08:00

GOODY LUCK TO EVERYONE WHO'RE COLLECTING THEIR Os RESULT TODAY =)

2007-02-08T20:00:00.000-08:00

I AINT A SMALL KID NO MORE!
stop treating me as one,
why must everything seem like i'm too young to understand!

stop pretending as if you guys know me very well.
you know nothing at all!

leave me alone!

2007-02-08T17:40:00.000-08:00

went to causeway for some shopping after sch,
but i couldnt find anything that i fancy at all =(
so i ended up getting baby's V.day prezzie and a necklace.

honey really got me addicted to peach red tea,
and i drank so fast that i nearly got choke when she told me something.
darn hilarious!
and i cant believe that she's actually that dumb. opps =x
anyway, we went to stroll ard in the pasar malam and i saw some HelloKitty stuffs that instantly got me thinking of eileen.
so i decided to get it for her,
and honey got herself a wallet and our little monster.

got followed on the way back home and it got pretty awkward when that guy approached me and i rejected to make friends with him,
thankfully honey was on the line with me.
when i mentioned it to baby, he actually laughed at me.
argh...

anyway, CNY is nxt week and i havent got my clothes yet!
actually, more like i cant find anything that i fancy and with my pimples popping out like popcorn now, i'm so worried that i'll look ugly on CNY.
*prays hard i wont

2007-02-07T21:00:00.000-08:00

i cried.

MY BRAIN SEEMS TO BE NOT FUNCTIONING PROPERLY RIGHT NOW!

2007-02-07T16:10:00.000-08:00

after the whole diarrhoea episode last night despite me not eating much the whole day, left me tossing ard in my bed without studying for my geog test today.
so i went to sch knowing totally nothing today!

i felt terribly giddy most of the time in sch,
even though i had my breakfast.
the worst time was definitely during maths lesson,
mrsKoh was teaching us a new topic.
i was trying so hard to figure out what she was saying cause i was so giddy that i felt as if my brain was floating inside my head.
now that i'm home, i'm coughing so badly...

even though i felt better by the time sch ended,
i decided to skip training for today.
looking at the sun, i'm afraid i've been pushing my body too much.
steph, honey and i got asked to stay back by mrsTan since we were being annoying by trying to disturb each other disrupting her geog lesson.
so right after she finished her lecture about how we shld be behaving,
i ran off cause i was supposed to stay back for POA remedial =x

got home and i realised that it's been ages since i'm home this early.
it feels quite good though,
since no one's home and i have the whole hse to myself.
i got pretty bored that i actually spent hours re-editing my friendster page.
anyway, i better get going, promised to help honey edit her's too.

2007-02-06T21:00:00.000-08:00

I FINALLY HAD MY HAIRCUT!
a million days of waiting and it's finally done with.

2007-02-05T20:10:00.001-08:00

yesterday
the day out with the guys was just great!
it couldnt be any better,
and it's been so long since i enjoyed myself so much.
thanks guys!

pinkie was so gonna vomit blood trying to get me to concentrate in the disposal account he was trying to coach me with.
so we caught a movie, Blood Diamonds in the evening.
seriously, it wasnt that bad,
i'll probably rate it 3.5/5 cupcakes.
slacked at the nearby playground ard my place,
confided each other and stuff before they got so high when we heard GOALLLLL and the young lions won.

some random pics taken.

they were so nice to send me back home and i already miss their company =(
totally cant wait to meet up with them again on sun.

today
it's been quite a rough day for me and i cant thank pinkie enough for being there for me.
shant elaborate bout it, but it affected me quite a bit.

i got rather confuse about how everything that was supposedly perfect.
i got rocked, and i, myself dont quite understand it too...

2007-02-04T11:40:00.000-08:00

i woke up having thought how scary the nightmare i had could actually felt so real.
i was afraid, i was horrified but as it continues,
i realised it all ended with smiles, hugs and kisses.

even so, i couldnt stop having flashbacks of it.
it felt so real, the touch, the kisses, the hugs...

i guess, this pretty spells how emo i'm feeling now till i meet up with the guys, and hopefully, they'll make my day.

upon coming online,
Craig David's You Don't Miss Your Water (Till The Well Runs Dry) keeps playing repeatedly in my head.
i cant help but to keep repeating the song right now,
it kindah explains how i'm feeling in a way.

As I close my eyes, sit back while reminiscing
Of when we used to fuss and fight but end up kissing
There may be sad and painful times along the way
But in my heart you'll always be everything and more to me

2007-01-31T03:10:00.000-08:00

the weather's been suchah ass for freezing me the moment i got out of the bathroom, to make things worse,
the wind was super duper strong and i felt like it was gonna be winter soon.

couldnt stop complaining about how bad the weather was as soon as i met up with the bestiie.
oh yes! there was this weirdo who walked past me outside the MRT station's toilet when i was waiting for honey, and he actually stared at my boobs right infront of me.
i totally felt digusted pls!
so maybe he thought that it was fun since i did nothing the first time,
he actually walked back again and stared at it.
the moment i stared right at him, he hurriedly looked away.
what's with guys this days?
sick in the head or what?

today's lessons were suchah bore!
due to the very freezing yet shoick weather,
it was impossible not to feel slpy.
with boring lessons right after another,
i was so close to dosing off halfway through SS.
as for geog, it seems more like a routine that everyone gets bored instantly when mrsTan walks in.
so i spent most of my time msging,
and i actually got caught by mrsTan while i was replying halfway.
being nice, she just told me to copy down the ans she wrote on the board and as i did what she said, i continued on replying.

seriously, we're truely greatful that the number of subs per day has been decreased but replacing it with a longer period is a killer.

being totally half-dead by the time sch ended,
honey and i decided to cab back home.

i'm really tired but i cant slp cause i dont have the habit of taking afternoon nap.
i guess, all i can do is just rest and i shall start on my homework and revision for chem test later on.

2007-01-29T20:20:00.000-08:00

seriously, i need to rant bout something before i continue on with my entry.

i dont deserve to be treated like a venting machine to you-know-who-you-are, i feel like a shit to you.
i've been very tolerate and understanding bout it but i too have feelings, why must you take it for granted just cause i'll forgive you every single time you decide to apologise to me?
does sorry really mean nothing at the end of the day?
than what's the point of apologising when it comes out just like any other ordinary word.

sch seems more like a picnic to us since we were munching most of the time inbetween lessons.
anyway, a few of us stayed back after sch and continued with our pride day inter-class competition.
we did lots of crazy stuffs, pumping up the music and getting all so hyped up.
a very different side of us since we didnt used to bond like this before,
i guess we've realised how fast this year's gonna end soon.
time is passing by us quickly but the bond between us is getting stronger,
and i definitely thank God for that.

stayed till late evening before we got chased out by the DonaldDuck.
who kept threatening us to hurry before he locked us in.
it was so hilarious that we couldnt stop laughing so loud trying to immitate him.

a horrible day turned great.
friends, you guys are worth more than anything.

2007-01-28T21:57:00.000-08:00

I'M FEELING EMO-ISH NOW.
I NEED A NEW HAIRCUT!

2007-01-28T20:20:00.000-08:00

friday
friday's match was one tough one for us since most of the time,
the scores were tied only till the very last min did we manage to score one goal and defeat AISS.
anyway, i hope that everyones injury will get better since almost our whole team is down with injuries.
great match girls!
but the really tough one has yet to come.

saturday
half my day was out with the bestiie, xiaoxuan and edwin,
while the other half was spent dearly with the loved one.
non-stop crapping and nonsense with edwin ard nvr fails.
did some window shopping but i left half way and headed over to SimLim with baby to check out some stuffs.
and than it was back to his place for me to have some rest.

surprisingly, baby finally agreed to get the couple ring.
he wanted to get it on V.day itself,
which means i'll be spending it with him.
i totally cant wait!

today
sis and the kids came over so we celebrated a surprised birthday for mingming.
a good rest at home and time spent with the family and friends.

a million thanks to pinkie for downloading songs,
he who said that it was just for me only.
so a million thanks to him!
and yea, we shld go catch a movie with jackie soon.

2007-01-24T19:52:00.000-08:00

alright, just got back home from training which i wont exactly say that it was a great one.
the sun was so freaking hot that i think it burnt and dried us all.

well, the four toilet bitches, which is us were late.
terribly late for 20mins and we got blasted by mrsKoh,
which landed us having to run ten rounds ard the court.
while trying to be funny taking every step without wearing my kneeguard, totally almost made me cried for help cause it did hurt quite a bit.

the usuals of mrsKoh dragging our time,
letting us leave ard an hour later than we were supposed to.
anyway, hope that fri's match will turn out better than expected.
GOOD LUCK TO US!

2007-01-24T06:50:00.000-08:00

MY LIFE SEEMS TO BE TURNING THE OTHER WAY ROUND.
THINGS SEEMS TO BE GOING SO WRG!

WHAT IS HAPPENING TO MY SUPPOSEDLY HAPPY ENDING?

~~GOOD~~ DAY.

2007-01-23T16:50:00.000-08:00

this will be a random entry.

it's difficult to end the weekends without a quarrel nowadays,
and it's scary to be quarreling over every single thing.
well, i will be the one starting most of the quarrels but it's because i dont feel assured at times.
simple things like our mthly anniversary can be either forgotten or rmbed wrgly, it does upset me alot even though it may seem like something small.

to me, simple things like this will mean a whole lot more.
reason being, it may just be a small matter but because it's small,
that doesnt mean that it isnt impt at all.

esp. to see how some friends ard seem to be luckiest ones ever and on the other end, some other friends will be struggling through just trying to make things work out.

i realised that no matter how close we are with our other half,
certain things will still be unnoticed.
rmbing what others used to tell me before,
it's when both are together for long that the small gestures will start fading, will not be as impt as how it used to be.

that's the prob.
it's because of being too comfortable and used to the person that one may think that these small gestures wont matter anymore.
i'm not sure bout others, but to me,
i personally feel that being together longer will make these small gestures even more impt than before...
agree?

anyway, no matter what happens,
i'm just glad that everything will still be solved at the end of the day.
that is what's more impt too,
to solve it properly putting down all pride and ego to talk it through.

I LOVE YOU!
- you know i do =)

"what could be worse than losing the person that you love"
quoted from SmallVille

2007-01-22T12:30:00.000-08:00

~~HAPPY~~ 16MTHS MY LOVE.

nvr let your love fade away...

i wonder how much this seems to you,
though you may think that it's a small matter.
but on the other hand, it means a whole lot more to me...
maybe, you just dont understand.

2007-01-21T16:15:00.000-08:00

NP's open hse was great,
just that there were too many ppl ard and having so lil time to look ard,
i gave a look at my course a skipped.
the happiest thing ever was that i saw Bud Bud,
it's been ages since i last saw him.
chilled ard with his friends and left slightly after.
nice ppl, nice knowing them as well.

friday
1hr 50mins of PE totally killed us, me.
by the time recess was over,
i was half dead during mrJoseph's lesson.
to end my day completely dead,
mdmLu had to make us stay back an hour extra for chinese remedial.

feeling like a dead corpse,
i gave training a skipped and went home.
lazed ard the rest of the day till baby came with dinner.
fell aslp while watching tv half way and when i woke up,
his ~~big~~ eyes were looking at me and he smiled.

you know how to melt my heart...

saturday
after dragging for two weeks, i finally went for tuition.
nothing much i guess, same tutor as before, 5yrs to be exact.

met up with baby in the evening and since the usuals of having nowhere to head to, we went back to Marina Square for the uncounted time.
in fact, every single weekend that has passed since x'mas eve.

dinner-ed at LerkThai, window shopped ard and left.
he drove ard before we finally settled down at the stretch of road at Changi looking at aeroplanes again, than down to Changi beach.
we were heading to nowhere in particular till baby took the wrg exit which he landed us both back at yishun.
upon seeing my face changed since i wasnt ready to head back home,
he brought me to Upper Seletar Reservior.
the both of us being cheeky, decided to do something naughty.
definitely NOT what your little peanuts up there are thinking,
all we did was parked inbetween two cars that were doing it inside.
how did we know?
that's simple aint it, having all four sides and the back of the car covered with newspaper and cloth.
they probably thought that it was thrilling experincing it in there.

anyway, we left soon after both car left since we were getting bored too.
headed home and enjoyed each other in the comfort of the little room of mine =)

today
got woken up all thks to my aunt whose voice is as loud as ever.
realised that i slpt in the wrg position during the night causing me to sprain my back.
OUCH PLS!

NorthZone offically starts tmr at SSS for us.
LOTS OF LOVE AND LUCK FOR US GIRLS!
i shall continue with my half done homewk for submission tmr.

2007-01-18T06:52:00.000-08:00

these few nights have got me pondering quite alot,
and it has even come to a point where i start questioning myself about all that i'm having.

i wonder what has become...

this is so random but,
i seriously wonder how 16mths & V.day's gonna be like for me?
one thing for sure, i wont be spending it with him =(

alright, TIME FOR SCH NOW!

2007-01-17T14:30:00.000-08:00

got up feeling super dizzy but i still dragged my ass out of bed and prepared for sch.
only when i felt it was totally impossible to move ard,
mummy said i better stay home.
YAY!
so i crashed right back to bed after a cup of milo and slpt till noon.

mummy suggested ordering Mac for lunch,
so it was burger, fries and ice tea.
was talking to mummy and well, it was a good chat.
TV, TV AND MORE TV!
daddy's been complaining that i'm watching too much tv now that sch has started.

oh well...
anyway, we're going for NP's open hse tmr after sch for some course thingy as well as to look at the courses offered.
am hoping to bump into many familar faces!
cousins, friends, bro(s)....
cant wait!
-

as i was browsing through my friends list on friendster,
it got me wondering why are some ppl born so almost-perfect but yet on the other hand, some are just so ordinary looking...

is it due to self-esteem or isit just that some just dont bother dolling up?
cant deny that some girls are born pretty naturally,
but most doll up for their almost perfect look.

and then i look back at myself...
how am i in other's eye?
then again, does it matter that how much others look at me?
contradicting, definitely yes!

i find it so hard to get clothes that are suitable for me,
but after attending the Motivation Camp,
i've learnt to blame no one.
alright, so i might be choosy at times, maybe always.
but nothing seems to fit me perfectly,
nothing seems to bring out the best in me,
futhermore, nothing brings out the confidence in me...

something for sure, no girl would wanna be called ugly.
treat all with respect!

2007-01-15T16:10:00.000-08:00

it's the start of a new week again,
and we are definitely dead tired since it's day one of week three.
ohmygoodness!
it's already WEEK THREE.

anyway, the start of my day totally sucked.
the stripe of my bag gave way and broke out of a sudden,
and that freaking bag just fell onto the ground with a loud thud giving us a scare.
i guess it's time to get a new sch bag. *hints hints

it's been raining non-stop and my knee is hurting =(
training tmr again, god bless me.

it's just the start of the week and i'm already missing baby so much.

2007-01-14T14:48:00.000-08:00

friday
it was the last day of our motivation camp and all of us learnt very impt knowledge there.
something that we wont get to learn in our daily lifes.

some impt phrases learnt:
(1) THE GREATEST FORM OF REVENGE IS TO BE SUCCESSFUL
(2) ALWAYS GIVE IN YOUR 100%
(3) EVERY CHOICE YOU MAKE HAVE A CONSEQUENCE
(4) LIVE YOUR LIFE WITHOUT ANY REGRESSION
(5) DOING THINGS YOU DONT LIKE WILL BENEFIT YOU

it was of so much fun, laughter and tears going on throughout the whole three days.
i personally loved the emotional part where they made us faced up to our inner self, our true self.
all of us cried like a baby cause we felt guilty of so much things that we nvr bother thinking about the past 16yrs.

thank you melvin, danny and woei tang...
YOU GUYS ARE ONE OF THE BEST TRAINERS EVER!
FOR A MORE DETAILED ENTRY OF WHAT WE'VE LEARNT THROUGHOUT THE THREE DAYS, POP OVER TO ADELINE'S BLOG.

we ended late cause we had a talk in the hall together with the parents and poor baby had to wait for me for half an hour.
dropped off honey at the mrt station before heading back to my place.
signal mum and they got ready for the surprise installed for baby.
he got a shocked when he opened the door,
they were carrying a birthday cake for him.
it was just priceless to see how shocked baby was.

got ready and we left ard 11 and headed pver to Macpherson for dinner.
we ate so much that we were bloated at the end...

what a great day to end with...

saturday
baby picked me up in the afternoonbefore we headed to Marina Square and Suntec, intended to do some shopping but i just couldnt find a right top, so i totally gave up.

the day wasnt exactly perfect since my mood was up&down.
slacked ard before baby brought me to a dog farm at Pasir Ris,
i was so into this particular puppy that i didnt felt like leaving.
we headed over to Changi Airport after and chilled over at coffee bean till ard 10 before baby brought me over to a stretch of road near Changi Village to look at aeroplanes fly/land.
i felt like a small girl at once,
getting all so fascinated looking the the planes.
we left ard 11 and we went to fetch his cousins before meeting up with his parents for supper at Geylang.

BLAHBLAHBLAH and my mood was totally spoilt,
i guess, i too spoilt their mood during supper.
felt so guilty but than again,
i was totally pissed off that i didnt bother much.

we totally ignored each other when he was driving me home,
and we totally lost it when we reached my place.
he let out everything but all i did was just cried,
i felt bad but i didnt did it on purpose...
i felt like shit inside but i wanted him to know how i felt inside.

thankfully, everything was solved after we talked properly instead of raising our voice at each other.

baby, i'm sorry.
i love you.

today
woke up slightly past one and the weather was too good to be missed.
i was so tired cause i reached home ard 2 in the morning plus my eyes were totally dead after crying so much...

brunch while watching television before i came online,
and i shall start on my homewk now.

i shall start motivating myself to study!

2007-01-10T22:05:00.000-08:00

Happy Birthday To My Dear Boy

i'm quite sad that i wasnt able to celebrate with baby today,
with the motivation camp ending at 9pm,
there was totally no way i could meet up with him =(

i totally cant wait for fri,
baby's fetching me from sch after my motivation camp ends and we're gonna go for supper as a belated celebration for him.

it's so amazing how time flies,
in just a blink of an eye, i've known him for 5yrs.
i can still rmb very clearly how baby used to look like when he was in sec3...
it just brings back so much memories.
not forgetting about everything we've been through,
tough yet a fruitful one.

Happy Birthday again my dear,
may the year ahead be smooth sailing for us both.
i love you!

2007-01-09T21:55:00.000-08:00

i was hoping that my knee(s) are going to get better,
or at least, it wouldnt hurt anymore.
sadly, i was just wrg!
everything was just the beginning of what i would say, hell.

just after two trainings, my knee(s) have worsen so much than before.
even walking now seems to be a prob.
it has affected my performance,
Northzone may start nxt week.
i shall hope just for a miracle to happen...

mrsKoh and the girls have advised me to check out what's wrg with my doc, and maybe get refered to a hospital for a thorough check-up.
if i'm lucky, relying on medication will be sufficient to heal whatever's wrg but if i'm not, i may have to undergo physiotherapy at S'pore Sports Council.

anyway, training was alright today except that the carpark was so slippery that none of us actually performed for fear of injuring ourselves just before Northzone.
smart girls!
did like a million times of the strategy before getting it almost perfect, totally got mrsKoh annoyed since it seemed like forever for a perfect pass to happen.
20mins of running everywhere ard the sch before training was officially over and none of us cant be any happier.

since my knee was a hinderance,
i decided to take a cab home to safe myself from walking.
with my delicious herbal cheeken awaiting for me at home,
my dinner was settled happily.

am so tired that i didnt even touch my books today.
lucky for us, our motivation camp offically starts tmr and ends on fri.
which means that we wont be having any books-based lessons for three freaking days.
YAY!

i shall get ready for bed soon.
it will be a very long day tmr since sch only ends at 9pm,
in fact, sch only ends at 9pm till the end of the week.

2007-01-08T19:23:00.000-08:00

it's very sad to see that someone can change so much within that short period of time.
it's hurting us to know that there's no way to let you know and accept that as a fact.

life, something no one can ever predict.
something that can make someone happy yet,
it can crush someone elses dream.
life, it made our good friend changed into someone who we totally dont recognise anymore.

i wish you can see the way it's hurting us so much.

2007-01-07T18:35:00.000-08:00

i'm just feeling very upset right now.
this time i've chose to keep mum and not let you know how i truely feel.
i'm sorry but i dont wish to spoil the fun.
I LOVE YOU!

2007-01-05T17:45:00.000-08:00

training ytd was just B O R I NG,
it almost seems like everything that's happening these few days seems rather boring to me.
so anyway, we did nothing much other than drills and competing captain's ball against the bballers since it was raining cats&dogs.

i totally lost my stamina after not training even one bit for 3mths.
totally lost it during PE today, had our 3.2km run and i couldnt even not stop every lil while.
to make things worse, my knee was hurting and aching that every step i took seems so heavy to me.
msTay said that i might have hurt my ligament,
hearing that totally sucks like shit.
Northzone is most prob starting 2weeks after,
how on earth am i gonna hang on with two injured knees?
the only solution to it for now is to wear a kneeguard,
i'll only go to the doc only if it continues hurting badly when i'm doing sports.
afterall, i dont wish to receive the bad news that i have to stop participating in sports.

daddy came to fetch me after sch today,
and i accompanyed him and mummy to the hospital for mummy's weekly checkup.
waited for quite a long time and we got rather agitated by it.
anyway, we have good news which is obviously good cause it means that mummy doesnt need to undergo op for it to heal completely.

shall end my post now.
am feeling very giddy so i'm gona rest before meeting meeting my dear boy for dinner.
YAY!
i miss him sooooooo much.
i havent seen him for four freaking days. gosh.

2007-01-03T18:15:00.000-08:00

everyone shld be wondering how's my first day of sch...
well, first day of sch is basically very B O R I N G!

every teacher that came in were saying almost exactly the same thing,
a few were being wet blankets as well, trying to hit us hard with the truth that getting promoted to sec5 is no joke and that we shld start having the correct attitude.
so the whole day was spent listening to repeated things and to make things worse, that plastic principle of ours had to give us a talk.
by the time he was done, it was almost time for sch to end.

the worse of the worse is that we'll be having a compulsory motivation camp thingy nxt wed to fri from 8am all the way to 9pm.
i really wonder if they're trying to kill us.
which means that i cant celebrate baby's birthday for him only until i get to see him on sat.
how great is that!

anyway, lots of things have been changed ard in sch.
like how our new uniform for the sec1(s) look totally awful,
the general office changing it's name to the admin office,
the HODs are being called Deans now etc...

after sch ended, steph, weili, adeline, honey and i cab to northpoint to check out some books that we're short off.
with weili leaving earlier, tanfon came too and joined the rest of us for lunch at the foodcourt.
it was hilarious how tanfon and steph were exchanging remarks about what the colours of their penis and boobs are.
BLAHBLAHBLAH, honey and i headed over to LJS together with bekah and joann to chill and caught up with stuffs.
while honey had to leave earlier, i stayed and left when they had to go for jonathan's chalet over at downtown east.

my first day of sch just ended like that.
how will tmr be like?

no matter what, i couldnt stop missing my baby the whole day.
it aches to have to accept that fact that i cant see him as often no more.

just so you know,
this feeling's taking control of me...
i miss you!

2007-01-02T21:40:00.000-08:00

i totally got a shock with uncounted times of trying to get my blog window to open,
for a moment i thought it got deleted somehow.
oh well, i was just scaring myself.

today's training was quite a blast!
except for the 10rounds we ran cause we were late from class trying to complete the class pride day thingy for submission supposedly tmr.
peishi wasnt ard so i got sub-ed up and i became the shooter for the day,
i'm so pleased with my performance today.
i was totally right on form, almost all shots got in.

rushed back to clas right after training to complete as much as possible.
we're actually good to go but since we do have some more time,
we've decided to add more to the class.
i guess the craziest thing we did today was to paint the wall outside our class,
heard that we were not allowed to but since we were too enthu bout it,
we didnt bother much bout what will happen when the teachers see it tmr.

it's been quite sometime since sis and i chatted on the phone,
and it was great catching up with her just now.
since her company is having some offer thingy,
we may be able to get our MotorRazrV3 cheaper.
i cant wait!
i shall pay for it this time, my first phone with my very own pay.

in times of darkness, i see your face.

2007-01-02T20:26:00.000-08:00

quality time spent with the bf before sch offically starts tmr.
am not sure what will be installed for the days to come,
but i hope that it's gonna be good.

2007-01-01T21:00:00.000-08:00

GOODBYE 2006, HELLO 2007.

New Year's Eve
it was the last day at work and boy was i feeling rather upset.
basically, i really will miss everyone at work but it was time to move on, to welcome and prepare for the new year ahead.

my sweet love came to fetch me after work and we headed to marina square to get our movie tickets before heading back to my place.
while i was getting ready, baby actually fell aslp for two whole hours.

since marina square's carpark was full, baby decided to park at suntec first before transfering over after.
finally settled our dinner at swensens after walking ard the basement for more than two rounds.
left right after but we had some probs with the marina square's carpark management before finally being able to get in.
totally bored ourselves to death since i wasnt very much in the mood to watch the fireworks.

we caught The Night At The Museum and i shant say it's a very good show.
the beginning of the show was totally B O R I N G,
and as it goes on, it was on and off-ly interesting.
i was semi awake at the beginning and when it got funny, it does get really funny but when it gets boring, i'll be on the verge on falling aslp.
anyway, i'll only rate it 3/5 stars.

after the movie, baby drove us both to Geylang hoping that the dim sam store wont be too crowded, but too bad, it was very crowded.
so a change of plan, we headed to Thomson for supper instead.
we were dead tired so we headed back right after,
and we got back to my place only after slightly past 4.
that slpy head crashed straight to bed while i had to wash up.

New Year
both of us being the slpy heads was still in bed even after 12,
we were finally awake slightly past 1 after my relatives surprised visit to spend some time with my mum.
when there's more than one family getting together,
who can expect peace and quietness?
they were so loud that baby and i got shocked out of our slp,
looking at each other with huge question marks on our heads.

washed up and introduced baby to them,
they were sooooooo nice and they kept asking him to eat.
it was so hilarious how baby just followed me ard while i was chasing after glen feeding him.

baby left ard 3, undenyable that i was very upset cause the thought that sch's gonna reopen in 2days more makes me feel...
i dread for sch to start so soon cause that will only mean that plans for our relationship will have to be changed all over again.
no more meeting up as often and no more saturday dates,
his training will be starting soon which means that our meeting every saturday will have to be replan somehow or another =(
oh man, i'll have to get use to whatever plan it will be.
i'll have to trust him that he'll know how to solve it out.

shall end here to catch my 9pm show.

2006-12-30T23:55:00.000-08:00

in a few mins time, it's gonna be the last day of year2006.
looking back at everything,
2006 has been quite a rough year turned good for me.

firstly, it's definitely getting through the rough patch with baby and finally getting back together.
it wasnt easy, nothing is ever easy but i'm glad we did worked things out and got to a decision that will make us both happier than before.
we're trying very hard to make this relationship right,
even though quarrels are unaviodable,it did brought us closer, getting to know more bout our differences and solving it together.
15mths, it's not too long, but neither isit short.
baby, you know i love you more than anything else.

secondly, i'm glad to say that i'm learning to be a better sis and daughter. i havent been a good one this whole while,
the gap between mummy and sis has been drawn closer.
ever since after i started work,
i've learnt how to communicate better with sis.
this job has made me realise how hard mummy is working thus making me respect her more than before as well.
i'm trying to understand and listen more than always insisting on everything going my way like a spoilt brat.
i'm trying, i just need more time.

thirdly, another year of our friendship has blossomed.
yea, i'm refering to you CHONG YA MEI!
thanks for being there as always, even though i can get quite unreasonable at times, it beats nothing having a genuine friend that truely understands the shits of life i've gone through.
not forgetting sis as well, IMMELIA!
another one who has nvr left me standing alone when i'm down,
thanks for listening to my cryings in the middle of the night,
cheering me up and helping me solve the downs of my relationship.
both of you have left me with lots of great memories for the year2006, the crazy stuffs and gossips and all...
all i can is I LOVEEEEE YOU GIRLS and truely thank you for everything you've done for me.
i hope that things will still stay as good and even better for the year2007.

fourthly, it's regarding my job at Borders.
though i'm quite upset that i actually spent my whole holiday working and havent exactly enjoyed at all, this job has taught me alot and even allowed me to make great friends.
now, i'm actually quite upset that tmr will be my last day.
I'LL DEFINITELY MISS YOU ALL!
i shall do a shoutout to thank you guys for making my days at Borders suchah very memorable one.
great friends like ben, fendi, sharil, silvia, jesstern, rafi, LUANA, SOPHIA and not forgetting evan who has been like a mentor to me.
without you guys, heading to work will seem like a chore to me but it's you guys that made me look forward for work everyday.
work will nvr seem like a chore when there's fun with you guys ard.

fifthly, CONGRATS TO SEVEN SISTERS!
we've finally did it,
am very glad that all of us managed to get promoted.
year2007 will definitely be a very hectic year for us with Os on it's way but i'm sure you girls will do great.
in just a few more days, we'll reunite together back at sch again.
though the thought of mugging like crazy is making me turn away, i'll work hard to try to achieve something to make my family and baby proud of me.
see you girls soon!

i guess that's pretty much all of year2006 summerised together...
i hope to have a great year ahead, you guys too =)

2006-12-27T21:00:00.000-08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

i know i've been missing for quite sometime, havent really got the time since i was down with fever again for the bloody third time since i started this job.

Christmas Eve
went to work as usual before meeting baby back at my place.
headed to Vivo to check out some stuffs before heading straight to Marina to collect the movie tickets from justina.
was walking ard when we bumped into immelia and daryl,
since i thought they were busy, we left.

walked ard slightly before meeting up with my sis and the kids,
headed up to their room at Ritz Carlton to chill while waiting for the time of our movie.

seeing how much baby and the kids clicked made me so impressed since they hardly click with ppl whom they're not close to.
the best moment was when baby and i holding were on to the youngest one while she stomped her feet while walking. how adorable!

we caught the movie the cursed of the golden flower,
wasnt very interested at first but i got hooked once it started.
a show worth to watch, i shall rate it 4/5.
after the movie, we had some prob finding where the car was since we went in from a different exit.
not only us to be exact, in fact everyone was carchasing.
walking around the huge carpark in search for their car.
it was so fun!
and the worst thing was,
it was very warm and baby couldnt stop perspiring.

on our way back, the love one's stomach was hungry so he drove us to thomson so he could have his supper before heading back to my place to crash on the bed.

Christmas Day
only got to crash onto bed at 4plus cause i had to wash up and all.
it was great having him by my side, even though he kept snooring.

got up and prepared for work before waking baby up,
and my sweet love drove me to mac to get my brunch before sending me to work.
went home to prepare before he came over and we headed to Changi Village for dinner.

it was so sweet of baby to keep looking out for that particular rude cleaner who couldnt seem to carry the dirty trays properly, she kept brushing it against my body and i totally felt so annoyed by it.

after dinner, he drove me to watch aeroplanes take off.
it was so pretty, but all i saw was planes landing = (
it doesnt matter,
i saw it with him and he totally ended my day with big smile on my face.

Boxing Day
our initial plan was to meet up till only ytd but we ended up meeting cause baby's friend had rented a car, so he came over to my place and brought me to Adam road for dinner.

it was raining cats&dogs and i was quite annoyed by him on our way back to the car.
he was sheltering the umbrella only for himself while i was getting wet at the side and he totally didnt cared.
i guess that totally ticked me off and i kindah flared a bit but my mood got better after much teasing from him.

today
the day at work went by pretty slow but surprisingly,
we had quite a few customers.
other than that, luana and i were pretty much chit-chatting and rotting, definitely with my none stop crappings and all, our day wasnt that bad.

baby's out with his friends now while i'm just lazing ard at home.
oh well, life's pretty much good enough for now.
having able to see him for six consecutive days,
i'm a happy girl!

2006-12-19T21:30:00.000-08:00

it wasnt easy making that decision,
but i still had to make one at the end of the day.

for the sake of myself, my future and my dreams,
i've chose to give myself a chance to promote.
though i'll be exposed to lots of other temptations, a very high chance of failing and losing the will power to continue on time&time again etc...

i will try to go on...

2006-12-18T20:15:00.000-08:00

ohmygoodness!

i've been touched by an angel or what?
the results came out totally suprising, 8points.
it's not very fantastic but totally unexpected.

the original plan of me enrolling into ITE is now &*!%#$&%
i'm so darn freaking confused right now that everything everyone is telling me is just making me soooooooooo much more confuse than i already am cause i cant freaking make a decision after getting psychoed by ppl who are asking me to choose different routes.

PROMOTE or ITE?
anyone?
HELP MEEEEEE!

2006-12-18T09:15:00.000-08:00

THE DAY OF TRUTH.
it will decide the future paths that lies ahead of us.

i'm not expecting fabulous results,
i know that i havent put in any effort for it.
lost hope before it started, gave up before it ended.

i'm ready to start afresh nxt year.
ITE may be the last choice i ever wanted,
but i've disappointed many and it seems like the only choice left for me.

FRIENDS out there who have always been by my side, i wanna thank you guys for your unconditioned love and support in everything that i do.
i know that choosing this path even way before the exams ended have made you guys quite upset but i seriously need a change in environment.

SEVENSISTERS, you girls have truely changed my life for the better. made me realised so much of things in life that i've missed out before. sorry that i broke the promise we made, to graduate together as one. i may not be ard you girls anymore, but i'm always still here, dont hesistate to look for me when you need help. hope our bond will be stronger than before the nxt time we meet up after the results.

TERENCE bro, your words have hurt me deep but i'm determined to prove you wrg. i know that you've nvr fail to have my best interest in your heart, hoping that i'll nvr step on the wrg stone that will make me fall. i know that i've truely disappointed you more than anyone, i'm sorry. though two years in ITE will not be short, i'll work hard and work my way into poly and that's when i'll walk up to you and say "bro, i've did it. i'm now in poly, the promised that you made two years ago for not talking to me if i ever get into ITE till i'm in poly can be erased"

i'm not expecting alot. just have a little faith in me.